I’m feeling a little bit inadequate. Apparently, a normal male averages 20 minutes when expressing his love physically; I’m assuming that includes the taxi journey and the queue for the cashpoint.
My haste is a blessing in disguise for the wife, as she’s on the phone to her mother every 15 minutes. Her old dear doesn’t want to hear my shrieking voice; again.
On the subject of hidden blessings, Arsenal may well benefit from the absence of Thierry Henry. The Gunners have looked a more cohesive unit without their talismanic captain this season, the 4/1 about an Arsenal win at the Bridge should be jumped on; but not for too long.
Robin Van Persie can open the scoring at 17/2. The little Dutchman’s left foot is so cultured; it can often be found sipping Pimms with Graeme Le Saux at the theatre.
Sir Alex believes that his United team are on the verge of greatness, Wayne Rooney may have toppled over the edge. The circular forward can inspire United to derby day domination at 4/11.
It’s rumoured that Cristiano Ronaldo has been offered the lead role in a remake of the Michael Douglas classic, ‘Falling Down’. The collapsible winger should be backed to score at any time at 9/4.
Biscuit magnate Eggert Magnusson has told the press that Alan Pardew’s throat will be cut if West Ham fail to perform; he’s one touch cookie. West Ham can snatch a point at the Reebok at 9/4. Nice.
Newcastle United and Robbie Savage have a lot in common, they’re both awful travellers. Somewhat surprisingly, the Toon Army have only tasted defeat at Ewood Park on one of their last eight visits; a Savage led Blackburn can buck that trend at 6/5.
Paul Jewell did a ‘Baldrick’ in the summer when he bought Emile Heskey, I now expect him to do ‘a Blackadder’ and take advantage of a rotten Boro. Wigan can leave the Riverside with three points at 13/5.
Pompey and Everton shared 1-0 wins in last season’s meet-ups, but ‘no goalscorer’ paid out in both matches. Only the betting naïve (like Harry ‘what’s a computer’ Redknapp) back a 0-0 scoreline. The ‘No goalscorer’ hat-trick is in play at 8/1.
Tottenham’s treatment of Jermain Defoe has left me as bemused as Monty Panesar. What could Defoe have done to deserve such shoddy treatment? Perhaps he spiked his spinach or sent Olive Oyl suggestive text messages. Spurs can beat up Charlton at 4/7, with or without the miniscule goal machine.
The wife is a big fan of Reading; she’s supported them ever since her English teacher wrote ‘reading difficulties’ on her school report. She’s backing the Royals at 13/8 to see off Watford; if I write out the betting slip.
It was odd to hear Neil Warnock begin a sentence with ‘I’m a bit like Arsene Wenger,’ as he questioned the Premier League’s schedule. That’s like the wife claiming to be ‘a bit like Madonna’ because she sings after lovemaking. I’m mad on a Villa win at Bramall Lane at 8/5.
Sheikh Mohammed may sound like a BNP policy, but he’s potentially the new owner of Liverpool FC. The billionaire is normally associated with the glamorous world of horse racing, where he can often be found discussing opera with Robin Van Persie’s left peg. The Reds have an easy looking match at home to Fulham, dive into the Pool at 4/11.
Man Utd, Blackburn, Liverpool, Tottenham and a Pompey draw are the virtually guaranteed selections for an 18/1 accer. Admittedly, it’s never over ‘til the fat lady sings; in my house, that’s normally after 64 seconds.
Weekend Betting:
Man Utd v Man City Saturday 9th December 12:45 Live on Premiership Plus
Man Utd 4/11
Draw 10/3
Man City 9/1
Get on: Man Utd
Match Special:
Ronaldo to be booked for diving 9/1
Blackburn v Newcastle Saturday 9th December 15:00
Blackburn 6/5
Draw 9/4
Newcastle 11/4
Get on: Blackburn
Match Special:
Blackburn to score three or more goals 4/1
Liverpool v Fulham Saturday 9th December 15:00
Liverpool 4/11
Draw 7/2
Fulham 17/2
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Bellamy to score two or more goals 5/1
Middlesbrough v Wigan Saturday 9th December 15:00
Middlesbrough 6/5
Draw 9/4
Wigan 13/5
Get on: Wigan
Match Special:
Camara to score the only goal of the game 50/1
Portsmouth v Everton Saturday 9th December 15:00
Portsmouth 6/5
Draw 9/4
Everton 9/4
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
No goalscorer in the match 8/1
Tottenham v Charlton Saturday 9th December 15:00
Tottenham 4/7
Draw 3/1
Charlton 11/2
Get on: Tottenham
Match Special:
Berbatov to score from outside the area 9/2
Watford v Reading Saturday 9th December 15:00
Watford 13/8
Draw 9/4
Reading 13/8
Get on: Reading
Match Special:
Doyle to score the first goal 11/2
Bolton v West Ham Saturday 9th December 17:15 Live on Premiership Plus
Bolton 10/11
Draw 9/4
West Ham 7/2
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Tevez to score in a 1-1 draw 20/1
Chelsea v Arsenal Sunday 10th December 16:00 Live on Sky
Chelsea 8/11
Draw 12/5
Arsenal 4/1
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Van Persie to score direct from a free-kick 10/1
Sheff Utd v Aston Villa Monday 11th December 20:00 Live on Sky
Sheff Utd 2/1
Draw 9/4
Aston Villa 8/5
Get on: Aston Villa
Match Special:
Villa to score a penalty 6/1
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
English Premiership Betting
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Showing posts with label Wayne Rooney. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Wayne Rooney. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 6, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
The ‘No Bell’ Peace Prize
I’m not one to blow my own horn; in fact, I only ever whip my horn out on special occasions, such as a birthday, a Christmas party or a comical episode of Soccer AM. However, it’s with a genuine sense of pride that I speak of my recent charity work; I’ve been heavily involved in raising awareness of lesbian issues via the medium of DVD.
A lot of my good work was undone when Paul Scholes allegedly made a homophobic remark to a referee. A spokesman for OutRage! may have quipped, “The cheek of it; if anyone should respect minority groups, it’s a ginger.”
I have a theory that Wayne Rooney’s poor recent form is a result of an infatuation with the carrot-topped midfielder. Let’s look at the evidence; Rooney’s slump began when Scholes returned to first team action; Wayne grew a camp ginger beard in some sort of bizarre homage to his hero, and if conclusive proof was still needed, Scholes is a well respected old pro; Rooney knows all about that. Should Sir Alex sell Scholes in order to get the best out of Rooney? I’ll let the purple-nosed one decide. Should Man U be backed at 4/7 to see off a struggling Wigan? Definitely.
Rooney is understandably frustrated by his below par performances; I’ve got a DVD that could help him out. It was a cheap shot for Rooney to blame the FA for his atrocious run, the staff at ‘Fatties Anonymous’ are said to be devastated by this unfounded allegation. Rooney’s an even money shot with the majority of the big boys to find the net this weekend, only the clinically insane will be on.
Glenn Hoddle labelled Didier Zokora ‘a blatant cheat’ after he dived to seal a victory against Pompey, and if anyone knows about karma it’s the eccentric tambourine-banging former England manager. Spurs travel to Villa Park to play a team with a 100% home record; get on the Villa at 11/8.
Juan Pablo Angel should be backed at 13/2 to net the opener. I can exclusively reveal that the Colombian hitman has a surprise tactic up his sleeve; he plans to roll the ball gently towards goal.
Thierry Henry is not only a great footballer, he’s a gentleman. I’m not sure how he persuaded his French team-mates to lie down against Scotland, but this charitable gesture proves the undoubted class of the man. The enigmatic genius looks back to his sublime best, he’s even added heading to his already impressive repertoire. Henry has been priced up at 12/1 to score a hat-trick against Watford at the Emirates, that’s bordering on appealing.
Van Persie’s also in fine nick, his volley against Charlton was the most talked about strike since mad Maggie tucked up the miners. Henry and Van Persie could potentially be the greatest double act since Skinner and Baddiel first watched Seinfeld and Costanza. You can’t get rich backing Arsenal at 1/5 to see off the outgunned Watford, but who wants to be Paul McCartney?
Joey Barton was fined £2,000 this week for showing Everton fans his backside. The Scousers were quite rightly seething about Joey’s full moon; if they wanted to see a hairy bum they would have logged on to robbiesavage.com. Everton are worth a punt at 9/5 to leave the Riverside with the win, a 1-0 scoreline is in play at 15/2 and ‘under 2.5’ goals in the game is a gimme at 4/6. (This match has had two goals or less on the last nine occasions.)
Fulham are the weekend nap at 11/10 at home to a moribund Charlton. The Addicks haven’t won at the Cottage for 20 years and have lost all of their matches on the road this season. Poor old Ian Dowie, it doesn’t look pretty.
It’s been a horrific season for Pompey’s Pedro Mendes. First, ‘Gentle Ben’ Thatcher introduced him to his forearm; then he was an unwilling co-star in a Didier Zokora production. As West Ham are the latest visitors to Fratton Park, a change of luck is almost guaranteed for Pedro; a home win appeals at even money.
Frank Lampard had the barefaced cheek to suggest that England need two holding midfielders to accommodate him; presumably one to hold the burgers and the other to hold the fries. Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho has stated that he’ll continue to select misfiring striker Andriy Shevchenko until he scores; Reading definitely won’t be on the end of a thumping. Backing Chelsea to win by either a 1-0 or a 2-0 scoreline looks a solid route to profit at 5/2.
Rafa Benitez changes his team more often than I have hot dinners. Actually, that’s probably an unfair comparison; Heather Mills wins the triple jump more often than the wife ventures into the kitchen. The constant tinkering hasn’t had a detrimental effect on performances though, Liverpool will see off Blackburn at 1/2.
Rovers haven’t had a man sent off for eight games now; that’s approaching a club record. It’s no coincidence that their disciplinary problems have eased since offloading Craig Bellamy to Liverpool; they should be awarded the ‘No Bell’ peace prize. Apologies. Bellamy may be a complete nause, but he’s a decent footballer; he’s almost nailed on at 9/2 to open the scoring against his former team-mates.
The acc of the week:
The accer this week is so conclusive, if Saddam Hussein introduced it as evidence in his trial, he’d be immediately acquitted. Man Utd, Arsenal, Everton, Portsmouth and Fulham are the picks; the payout is a gargantuan 20/1.
The quote of the week:
“We urge Paul Scholes to apologise and to express his opposition to homophobia. It might help him understand and appreciate gay issues if he visited Manchester's Gay Centre and Lesbian & Gay Foundation.”
Would it not be easier to just read Ashley Cole’s autobiography? (He mentions how tough it was dealing with false accusations.)
The lay man:
Scientists believe that anything is possible; they obviously haven’t taken into consideration Charlton’s form away from home. Lay the Addicks at 3/1.
Weekend Betting:
Wigan v Man Utd Saturday 14th October 12:45 Live on Sky
Wigan 6/1
Draw 14/5
Man Utd 4/7
Get on: Man Utd
Match Special:
Ronaldo to score at any time 15/8
Arsenal v Watford Saturday 14th October 15:00
Arsenal 1/5
Draw 11/2
Watford 16/1
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Henry and Van Persie both to score 3/1
Aston Villa v Tottenham Saturday 14th October 15:00
Aston Villa 11/8
Draw 9/4
Tottenham 5/2
Get on: Aston Villa
Match Special:
Angel to score with a header 9/2
Liverpool v Blackburn Saturday 14th October 15:00
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 3/1
Blackburn 7/1
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Bellamy to score two or more goals 4/1
Man City v Sheff Utd Saturday 14th October 15:00
Man City 8/11
Draw 13/5
Sheff Utd 4/1
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
No goalscorer in the match 10/1
Middlesbrough v Everton Saturday 14th October 15:00
Middlesbrough 13/8
Draw 9/4
Everton 9/5
Get on: Everton
Match Special:
Andy Johnson to score the only goal of the game 28/1
Portsmouth v West Ham Saturday 14th October 15:00
Portsmouth Evs
Draw 9/4
West Ham 10/3
Get on: Portsmouth
Match Special:
Pedro Mendes to score from outside the area 12/1
Reading v Chelsea Saturday 14th October 17:15 Live on Premiership Plus
Reading 13/2
Draw 10/3
Chelsea 1/2
Get on: Chelsea
Match Special:
Drogba to score the first goal 9/2
Newcastle v Bolton Sunday 15th October 16:00 Live on Sky
Newcastle 11/8
Draw 11/5
Bolton 21/10
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Fulham v Charlton Monday 16th October 20:00 Live on Sky
Fulham 11/10
Draw 9/4
Charlton 13/5
Get on: Fulham
Match Special:
Fulham to score three or more goals 7/2
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
A lot of my good work was undone when Paul Scholes allegedly made a homophobic remark to a referee. A spokesman for OutRage! may have quipped, “The cheek of it; if anyone should respect minority groups, it’s a ginger.”
I have a theory that Wayne Rooney’s poor recent form is a result of an infatuation with the carrot-topped midfielder. Let’s look at the evidence; Rooney’s slump began when Scholes returned to first team action; Wayne grew a camp ginger beard in some sort of bizarre homage to his hero, and if conclusive proof was still needed, Scholes is a well respected old pro; Rooney knows all about that. Should Sir Alex sell Scholes in order to get the best out of Rooney? I’ll let the purple-nosed one decide. Should Man U be backed at 4/7 to see off a struggling Wigan? Definitely.
Rooney is understandably frustrated by his below par performances; I’ve got a DVD that could help him out. It was a cheap shot for Rooney to blame the FA for his atrocious run, the staff at ‘Fatties Anonymous’ are said to be devastated by this unfounded allegation. Rooney’s an even money shot with the majority of the big boys to find the net this weekend, only the clinically insane will be on.
Glenn Hoddle labelled Didier Zokora ‘a blatant cheat’ after he dived to seal a victory against Pompey, and if anyone knows about karma it’s the eccentric tambourine-banging former England manager. Spurs travel to Villa Park to play a team with a 100% home record; get on the Villa at 11/8.
Juan Pablo Angel should be backed at 13/2 to net the opener. I can exclusively reveal that the Colombian hitman has a surprise tactic up his sleeve; he plans to roll the ball gently towards goal.
Thierry Henry is not only a great footballer, he’s a gentleman. I’m not sure how he persuaded his French team-mates to lie down against Scotland, but this charitable gesture proves the undoubted class of the man. The enigmatic genius looks back to his sublime best, he’s even added heading to his already impressive repertoire. Henry has been priced up at 12/1 to score a hat-trick against Watford at the Emirates, that’s bordering on appealing.
Van Persie’s also in fine nick, his volley against Charlton was the most talked about strike since mad Maggie tucked up the miners. Henry and Van Persie could potentially be the greatest double act since Skinner and Baddiel first watched Seinfeld and Costanza. You can’t get rich backing Arsenal at 1/5 to see off the outgunned Watford, but who wants to be Paul McCartney?
Joey Barton was fined £2,000 this week for showing Everton fans his backside. The Scousers were quite rightly seething about Joey’s full moon; if they wanted to see a hairy bum they would have logged on to robbiesavage.com. Everton are worth a punt at 9/5 to leave the Riverside with the win, a 1-0 scoreline is in play at 15/2 and ‘under 2.5’ goals in the game is a gimme at 4/6. (This match has had two goals or less on the last nine occasions.)
Fulham are the weekend nap at 11/10 at home to a moribund Charlton. The Addicks haven’t won at the Cottage for 20 years and have lost all of their matches on the road this season. Poor old Ian Dowie, it doesn’t look pretty.
It’s been a horrific season for Pompey’s Pedro Mendes. First, ‘Gentle Ben’ Thatcher introduced him to his forearm; then he was an unwilling co-star in a Didier Zokora production. As West Ham are the latest visitors to Fratton Park, a change of luck is almost guaranteed for Pedro; a home win appeals at even money.
Frank Lampard had the barefaced cheek to suggest that England need two holding midfielders to accommodate him; presumably one to hold the burgers and the other to hold the fries. Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho has stated that he’ll continue to select misfiring striker Andriy Shevchenko until he scores; Reading definitely won’t be on the end of a thumping. Backing Chelsea to win by either a 1-0 or a 2-0 scoreline looks a solid route to profit at 5/2.
Rafa Benitez changes his team more often than I have hot dinners. Actually, that’s probably an unfair comparison; Heather Mills wins the triple jump more often than the wife ventures into the kitchen. The constant tinkering hasn’t had a detrimental effect on performances though, Liverpool will see off Blackburn at 1/2.
Rovers haven’t had a man sent off for eight games now; that’s approaching a club record. It’s no coincidence that their disciplinary problems have eased since offloading Craig Bellamy to Liverpool; they should be awarded the ‘No Bell’ peace prize. Apologies. Bellamy may be a complete nause, but he’s a decent footballer; he’s almost nailed on at 9/2 to open the scoring against his former team-mates.
The acc of the week:
The accer this week is so conclusive, if Saddam Hussein introduced it as evidence in his trial, he’d be immediately acquitted. Man Utd, Arsenal, Everton, Portsmouth and Fulham are the picks; the payout is a gargantuan 20/1.
The quote of the week:
“We urge Paul Scholes to apologise and to express his opposition to homophobia. It might help him understand and appreciate gay issues if he visited Manchester's Gay Centre and Lesbian & Gay Foundation.”
Would it not be easier to just read Ashley Cole’s autobiography? (He mentions how tough it was dealing with false accusations.)
The lay man:
Scientists believe that anything is possible; they obviously haven’t taken into consideration Charlton’s form away from home. Lay the Addicks at 3/1.
Weekend Betting:
Wigan v Man Utd Saturday 14th October 12:45 Live on Sky
Wigan 6/1
Draw 14/5
Man Utd 4/7
Get on: Man Utd
Match Special:
Ronaldo to score at any time 15/8
Arsenal v Watford Saturday 14th October 15:00
Arsenal 1/5
Draw 11/2
Watford 16/1
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Henry and Van Persie both to score 3/1
Aston Villa v Tottenham Saturday 14th October 15:00
Aston Villa 11/8
Draw 9/4
Tottenham 5/2
Get on: Aston Villa
Match Special:
Angel to score with a header 9/2
Liverpool v Blackburn Saturday 14th October 15:00
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 3/1
Blackburn 7/1
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Bellamy to score two or more goals 4/1
Man City v Sheff Utd Saturday 14th October 15:00
Man City 8/11
Draw 13/5
Sheff Utd 4/1
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
No goalscorer in the match 10/1
Middlesbrough v Everton Saturday 14th October 15:00
Middlesbrough 13/8
Draw 9/4
Everton 9/5
Get on: Everton
Match Special:
Andy Johnson to score the only goal of the game 28/1
Portsmouth v West Ham Saturday 14th October 15:00
Portsmouth Evs
Draw 9/4
West Ham 10/3
Get on: Portsmouth
Match Special:
Pedro Mendes to score from outside the area 12/1
Reading v Chelsea Saturday 14th October 17:15 Live on Premiership Plus
Reading 13/2
Draw 10/3
Chelsea 1/2
Get on: Chelsea
Match Special:
Drogba to score the first goal 9/2
Newcastle v Bolton Sunday 15th October 16:00 Live on Sky
Newcastle 11/8
Draw 11/5
Bolton 21/10
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Fulham v Charlton Monday 16th October 20:00 Live on Sky
Fulham 11/10
Draw 9/4
Charlton 13/5
Get on: Fulham
Match Special:
Fulham to score three or more goals 7/2
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
Wednesday, October 4, 2006
Where are you now…when I kneed you
Without constructive criticism, improvement is virtually impossible. Armed with this noble philosophy and an in depth knowledge of the beautiful game, I have decided to share a couple of potentially helpful observations with the great minds of the English FA.
Steve McClaren is a tool. Macca was a poor manager at club level, he’s so far out of his depth on the international stage that it’s a miracle he’s not suffering from the bends.
His original decision to drop Beckham was flawed at best, but when offered the ‘get out of jail free’ card that was the injuries to Hargreaves and Lennon, he preferred to utilise the ‘skills’ of Jenas, Downing and Richardson. You simply can’t back this England team at odds of 1/10 against a reasonable Macedonian outfit; although I wouldn’t dissuade anyone from perming a 1-0 / 2-0 / 3-0 win at a much healthier 7/5.
I’m not a great admirer of Peter Crouch as a rule, but thanks to a process of elimination i’ve reached the shocking conclusion that he’s England’s most likely goal scorer. Rooney’s struggling, Gerrard’s wasted on the wing, Downing’s a million miles from international class and Lampard would need 29 attempts to score on an 18-30 (stone) holiday. Back Crouch at even money to keep up his incredible recent record.
If the England team were picked on current form, Wayne Rooney wouldn’t get a look in; he’s currently giving the ball away like a ginger schoolboy. Wayne hasn’t scored a competitive goal for England for over two years, my initial shock at seeing 8/13 for a Rooney goal soon faded as the realisation dawned that he’ll be available at 6/5 not to score. Merry Christmas, everyone.
Most people know ELO as the awful 1970’s progressive rock outfit, but the ELO ratings are a tool for judging the strengths of international football teams. While FIFA have Scotland as the 34th strongest team in world football, ELO show a more realistic 40th place. Strangely, both differ dramatically from my own personal rating system, where the Sweaties are sandwiched between the Amazonian Forest and Krakatoa in 594th place.
France have the luxury of a match against Scotland at Hampden; or ‘Le Bye’ as it’s known in Paris. Value is normally harder to find than a Scotsman at a World Cup but the French are the literal definition at 7/10.
Call me paranoid, but before buying lamb from a butcher I always enquire from where the meat originated; you can’t be too careful. Wales host Slovakia in their qualifier and an away win is definitely on the cards. The Slovaks have seen off Germany and France over the last year; you should get involved at 2/1.
How on earth did the phrase ‘the luck of the Irish’ originate? An 80 year war for independence must have been grating, running out of potatoes is always annoying and if conclusive proof was needed that luck is not on their side; they landed in the same qualifying group as Germany and the Czech Republic. The Irish have been decimated by injuries for their trip to Cyprus, the draw appeals at 16/5.
Northern Ireland’s recent win over Spain was perhaps the most unlikely result since Goliath took a dive against David after laying himself heavily on the exchanges. There are many phrases that could adequately describe the 2/7 on offer for a Danish side (who have recently destroyed Poland, Portugal and England) playing at home to Lawrie Sanchez’s minnows; I’ve settled for ‘the best bet in the history of gambling’.
The Italians have stubbornly refused to win in their campaign so far, somehow knowing they were the last leg of my accer. Italy destroyed Ukraine in a world cup quarter final in the summer, a repeat at 1/2 should not be ruled out.
Ever since I watched Prisoner Cell Block H as a child, i’ve felt a strong affinity with the Aussies. Bea Smith’s fight against drugs within the prison system was as inspirational as it was dramatic. Australia face Paraguay in a friendly match live on Eurosport, I like the Aussies at a criminally large 11/10.
There’s always something happening in the Dutch camp. An injury to Huntelaar forced the Holland manager to offer Van Nistelrooy a return to the International stable, but the Ruud boy told Van Basten where to stick his olive branch, and it wasn’t in a local dike. Holland have the quality to stroll to a win in Bulgaria, the 4/5 should be snapped up.
The acc of the week:
This week’s accer is so delightful; Paul McCartney is considering reuniting with Heather Mills as a direct result. “I may go out on a limb and ask her to come back,” a loved up McCartney may have mused. Slovakia, France, Holland, Denmark and Italy are the teams, the payout is a generous 16/1.
The quote of the week
“I don't like diving, football doesn't need it.”
Wayne Rooney on the curse of the modern game; Sol Campbell is currently looking for a fresh pair of underpants.
The lay man:
While the fat cats hoover up all the free money laying Northern Ireland at 16/1, us normal Joes can make a profit taking on the Sweaties at 6/1.
Weekend Betting:
Wales v Slovakia Saturday 7th October 15:00 Live on Sky
Wales 6/4
Draw 11/5
Slovakia 2/1
Selection: Slovakia
Suggested bet
No bet
England v Macedonia Saturday 7th October 17:00 Live on BBC
England 1/10
Draw 8/1
Macedonia 33/1
Selection: England
Suggested bet
England to win either 1-0/2-0/3-0 3 pts @ 7/5
Scotland v France Saturday 7th October 17:00 Live on Sky
Scotland 9/2
Draw 5/2
France 7/10
Selection: France
Suggested bet
France to win 2 pts @ 7/10
Cyprus v Rep of Ireland Saturday 7th October 17:30
Cyprus 13/2
Draw 16/5
Rep of Ireland 1/2
Selection: Draw
Suggested bet
Lay Ireland at 1/2 (to win 2 pts)
Bulgaria v Holland Saturday 7th October 19:00
Bulgaria 4/1
Draw 12/5
Holland 4/5
Selection: Holland
Suggested bet
No bet
Denmark v Northern Ireland Saturday 7th October 19:00 Live on BBC NI
Denmark 2/7
Draw 4/1
Northern Ireland 16/1
Selection: Denmark
Suggested bet
Denmark to win 7 pts @ 2/7
Italy v Ukraine Saturday 7th October 19:50
Italy 1/2
Draw 14/5
Ukraine 13/2
Selection: Italy
Suggested bet
No bet
Australia v Paraguay (Int’l friendly) Saturday 7th October 10:30 Live on Eurosport
Australia 11/10
Draw 9/4
Paraguay 3/1
Selection: Australia
Suggested bet
No bet
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
English Premiership Betting
Tags
Premiership soccer football betting soccer betting betting football betting bookmakers
Steve McClaren is a tool. Macca was a poor manager at club level, he’s so far out of his depth on the international stage that it’s a miracle he’s not suffering from the bends.
His original decision to drop Beckham was flawed at best, but when offered the ‘get out of jail free’ card that was the injuries to Hargreaves and Lennon, he preferred to utilise the ‘skills’ of Jenas, Downing and Richardson. You simply can’t back this England team at odds of 1/10 against a reasonable Macedonian outfit; although I wouldn’t dissuade anyone from perming a 1-0 / 2-0 / 3-0 win at a much healthier 7/5.
I’m not a great admirer of Peter Crouch as a rule, but thanks to a process of elimination i’ve reached the shocking conclusion that he’s England’s most likely goal scorer. Rooney’s struggling, Gerrard’s wasted on the wing, Downing’s a million miles from international class and Lampard would need 29 attempts to score on an 18-30 (stone) holiday. Back Crouch at even money to keep up his incredible recent record.
If the England team were picked on current form, Wayne Rooney wouldn’t get a look in; he’s currently giving the ball away like a ginger schoolboy. Wayne hasn’t scored a competitive goal for England for over two years, my initial shock at seeing 8/13 for a Rooney goal soon faded as the realisation dawned that he’ll be available at 6/5 not to score. Merry Christmas, everyone.
Most people know ELO as the awful 1970’s progressive rock outfit, but the ELO ratings are a tool for judging the strengths of international football teams. While FIFA have Scotland as the 34th strongest team in world football, ELO show a more realistic 40th place. Strangely, both differ dramatically from my own personal rating system, where the Sweaties are sandwiched between the Amazonian Forest and Krakatoa in 594th place.
France have the luxury of a match against Scotland at Hampden; or ‘Le Bye’ as it’s known in Paris. Value is normally harder to find than a Scotsman at a World Cup but the French are the literal definition at 7/10.
Call me paranoid, but before buying lamb from a butcher I always enquire from where the meat originated; you can’t be too careful. Wales host Slovakia in their qualifier and an away win is definitely on the cards. The Slovaks have seen off Germany and France over the last year; you should get involved at 2/1.
How on earth did the phrase ‘the luck of the Irish’ originate? An 80 year war for independence must have been grating, running out of potatoes is always annoying and if conclusive proof was needed that luck is not on their side; they landed in the same qualifying group as Germany and the Czech Republic. The Irish have been decimated by injuries for their trip to Cyprus, the draw appeals at 16/5.
Northern Ireland’s recent win over Spain was perhaps the most unlikely result since Goliath took a dive against David after laying himself heavily on the exchanges. There are many phrases that could adequately describe the 2/7 on offer for a Danish side (who have recently destroyed Poland, Portugal and England) playing at home to Lawrie Sanchez’s minnows; I’ve settled for ‘the best bet in the history of gambling’.
The Italians have stubbornly refused to win in their campaign so far, somehow knowing they were the last leg of my accer. Italy destroyed Ukraine in a world cup quarter final in the summer, a repeat at 1/2 should not be ruled out.
Ever since I watched Prisoner Cell Block H as a child, i’ve felt a strong affinity with the Aussies. Bea Smith’s fight against drugs within the prison system was as inspirational as it was dramatic. Australia face Paraguay in a friendly match live on Eurosport, I like the Aussies at a criminally large 11/10.
There’s always something happening in the Dutch camp. An injury to Huntelaar forced the Holland manager to offer Van Nistelrooy a return to the International stable, but the Ruud boy told Van Basten where to stick his olive branch, and it wasn’t in a local dike. Holland have the quality to stroll to a win in Bulgaria, the 4/5 should be snapped up.
The acc of the week:
This week’s accer is so delightful; Paul McCartney is considering reuniting with Heather Mills as a direct result. “I may go out on a limb and ask her to come back,” a loved up McCartney may have mused. Slovakia, France, Holland, Denmark and Italy are the teams, the payout is a generous 16/1.
The quote of the week
“I don't like diving, football doesn't need it.”
Wayne Rooney on the curse of the modern game; Sol Campbell is currently looking for a fresh pair of underpants.
The lay man:
While the fat cats hoover up all the free money laying Northern Ireland at 16/1, us normal Joes can make a profit taking on the Sweaties at 6/1.
Weekend Betting:
Wales v Slovakia Saturday 7th October 15:00 Live on Sky
Wales 6/4
Draw 11/5
Slovakia 2/1
Selection: Slovakia
Suggested bet
No bet
England v Macedonia Saturday 7th October 17:00 Live on BBC
England 1/10
Draw 8/1
Macedonia 33/1
Selection: England
Suggested bet
England to win either 1-0/2-0/3-0 3 pts @ 7/5
Scotland v France Saturday 7th October 17:00 Live on Sky
Scotland 9/2
Draw 5/2
France 7/10
Selection: France
Suggested bet
France to win 2 pts @ 7/10
Cyprus v Rep of Ireland Saturday 7th October 17:30
Cyprus 13/2
Draw 16/5
Rep of Ireland 1/2
Selection: Draw
Suggested bet
Lay Ireland at 1/2 (to win 2 pts)
Bulgaria v Holland Saturday 7th October 19:00
Bulgaria 4/1
Draw 12/5
Holland 4/5
Selection: Holland
Suggested bet
No bet
Denmark v Northern Ireland Saturday 7th October 19:00 Live on BBC NI
Denmark 2/7
Draw 4/1
Northern Ireland 16/1
Selection: Denmark
Suggested bet
Denmark to win 7 pts @ 2/7
Italy v Ukraine Saturday 7th October 19:50
Italy 1/2
Draw 14/5
Ukraine 13/2
Selection: Italy
Suggested bet
No bet
Australia v Paraguay (Int’l friendly) Saturday 7th October 10:30 Live on Eurosport
Australia 11/10
Draw 9/4
Paraguay 3/1
Selection: Australia
Suggested bet
No bet
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
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Thursday, September 7, 2006
Sore Berries and Cream
Having been involved in the sports betting game since I was knee high to Paul Dickov, I’ve pretty much seen it all; I’m practically unshockable. Admittedly, when Frank Lampard was announced ‘the 2nd best player in the world’, I was slightly taken aback; when a 17 year old Maria Sharapova won Wimbledon, I raised more than an eyebrow, but when news broke that West Ham had signed Tevez and Mascherano, i actually collapsed like Pedro Mendes.
This is the most jaw-dropping transfer since Howard Wilkinson began the Manchester United era of dominance by selling Cantona for £1m. But while intellectuals pontificate about the rights and wrongs of the deal, the truly clever are profiting from the situation by backing West Ham at 12/1 in the ‘betting without the big 4’ market; that was a decent shout before two of the world’s best players became bubble-blowers.
The Hammers can consider themselves lucky; the last time I managed to get my hands on a quality pair, the filth arrested me. On a related note, my cousin once wanted to be a police officer; you can imagine my sense of pride when he decided to clean car windows at traffic lights instead.
I was disappointed to hear that the old Bill were sniffing around the Ben Thatcher incident, there’s a time and a place for the plod, it’s normally three and a half hours after you’ve called them. Man City will be without Thatcher when they travel to Reading, it would be criminal to miss the Royals at an elbow-jerking 7/5.
Everton’s preparations for the Merseyside derby have been rocked by Roongate. David Moyes was so incensed by Wayne’s autobiography serialisation that he’s started legal proceedings. I guess Rooney will soon be sporting a new t-shirt; ‘Once a blue, always a blue - unless I feel the need to justify leaving for a bigger club by completely destabilising them’. Liverpool should be backed at 11/10 to leave Goodison Park with the Scouse bragging-rights.
Steven Gerrard came out with the most entertaining one-liner since Pete Doherty this week. He joked, “Peter Crouch is a great finisher; i hope he beats Bobby Charlton's record.” Well, i hope to one day sleep with Maria Sharapova, but it ain’t gonna happen…again. To be fair to Gerrard, the big man is on fire; even I’m considering backing him at 13/2 to net the opener.
The revelation that Gallas threatened to score an own goal if Chelsea picked him against his will has even got the wife upset. I overheard her in a conversation with her mother: “That’s one small Willy” she complained, and she’s right. The signing of Gallas and Baptista finally adds much needed steel to the Gunners armoury, Arsenal are available at 4/11 to see off Middlesbrough, please meet the weekend nap.
Thierry Henry loves facing the Boro, of the incredible 16 goals that Middlesbrough have conceded in their last three visits to Arsenal in the Premiership, Terrence has bagged 6 of them. They say form is temporary, but class is permanent, (If that’s true, where’s Pele now?) Henry is 14/1 to net a hat-trick.
Man U have started the season superbly, but their decision not to replace Van the man in the transfer window could leave Fergie red-faced. (Looking on the bright side, his nose will fit right in.) While Man U are lightweight up front, Spurs have more quality than Ben Thatcher could shake an elbow at. Defoe, Keane, Berbatov and Mido are all top-drawer operators, my value sensor has sniffed out the draw at 11/4.
Neil Warnock broke the bank on deadline day, bringing in Kazim-Richards for a fee believed to be in the region of £150,000, that’s a pretty poor region. Blackburn have visited Bramall Lane twice in the Premiership, they left with all three points on both occasions. Chance may have no memory, but Sheffield United have no players; the Rovers are the call at 7/4.
Paul Jewell will be delighted that Emile Heskey has opened his account, although, if he really thought about it, it’s probably a bad thing that 33% of his total goals for the season are in the bag already. Wigan travel to a revitalised Pompey, I can’t see any other result than a home win, a juicy 5/6 is on offer.
While Chelsea’s attack on Gallas did Willy little favours, it hardly promoted the Champions in a positive light. My favourite line from the press release was the accusation that he was ‘hawking himself to the highest bidder’, there’s a kettle looking to tool a pot somewhere. Charlton will be demolished at the Bridge, take advantage at 1/5.
The acc of the week:
The accer this week is so assured; it would take a team of women working around the clock to even begin to demoralise it. Liverpool, Arsenal, Bolton, Portsmouth and Blackburn are the selections, the payout is a shade under 20/1.
The weekend specials:
“Nic is in a twist” - Anelka to be sent off 25/1
“Mido's touch” - Mido to score at any time 3/1
“Hey Mascherano” - Javier Mascherano to be booked 7/4
“Auf Wiedersehen, Pet” - Stilian Petrov to be sent off 40/1
“All mouth and no Scousers” - A player to be sent off in the Merseyside derby 2/1
The quote of the week
“At this stage, no proceedings have been issued against Wayne Rooney, for various reasons. The book has got to be fully read and David Moyes has to consider whether that is something he wants to do.”
That’s too much to ask of any one man.
The lay man:
People are lining up to back Man U at 8/15 on the exchanges. Spurs are unbeaten in their last two trips to Old Trafford, let’s accommodate them.
Weekend Betting:
Everton v Liverpool Saturday 9th September 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Everton 3/1
Draw 9/4
Liverpool 11/10
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Peter Crouch to score with a header 9/2
Arsenal v Middlesbrough Saturday 9th September 15.00
Arsenal 4/11
Draw 7/2
Middlesbrough 9/1
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Arsenal to win 4-0 16/1
Bolton v Watford Saturday 9th September 15.00
Bolton 4/6
Draw 12/5
Watford 5/1
Get on: Bolton
Match Special:
Anelka to score two or more goals 9/2
Chelsea v Charlton Saturday 9th September 15.00
Chelsea 1/5
Draw 5/1
Charlton 16/1
Get on: Chelsea
Match Special:
Shevchenko to score a hat-trick 14/1
Newcastle v Fulham Saturday 9th September 15.00
Newcastle 4/5
Draw 12/5
Fulham 4/1
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 6/1
Portsmouth v Wigan Saturday 9th September 15.00
Portsmouth 5/6
Draw 9/4
Wigan 4/1
Get on: Portsmouth
Match Special:
Portsmouth to win and keep a clean sheet 2/1
Sheff Utd v Blackburn Saturday 9th September 15.00
Sheff Utd 13/8
Draw 9/4
Blackburn 7/4
Get on: Blackburn
Match Special:
McCarthy to score at any time 9/4
Man Utd v Tottenham Saturday 9th September 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Man Utd 1/2
Draw 11/4
Tottenham 13/2
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Carrick to be booked 7/2
West Ham v Aston Villa Sunday 10th September 16.00 Live on Sky
West Ham 6/5
Draw 11/5
Aston Villa 5/2
Get on: West Ham
Match Special:
Tevez to score the first goal 13/2
Reading v Man City Monday 11th September 20.00 Live on Sky
Reading 7/5
Draw 9/4
Man City 21/10
Get on: Reading
Match Special:
Reading to score three or more goals 5/1
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
This is the most jaw-dropping transfer since Howard Wilkinson began the Manchester United era of dominance by selling Cantona for £1m. But while intellectuals pontificate about the rights and wrongs of the deal, the truly clever are profiting from the situation by backing West Ham at 12/1 in the ‘betting without the big 4’ market; that was a decent shout before two of the world’s best players became bubble-blowers.
The Hammers can consider themselves lucky; the last time I managed to get my hands on a quality pair, the filth arrested me. On a related note, my cousin once wanted to be a police officer; you can imagine my sense of pride when he decided to clean car windows at traffic lights instead.
I was disappointed to hear that the old Bill were sniffing around the Ben Thatcher incident, there’s a time and a place for the plod, it’s normally three and a half hours after you’ve called them. Man City will be without Thatcher when they travel to Reading, it would be criminal to miss the Royals at an elbow-jerking 7/5.
Everton’s preparations for the Merseyside derby have been rocked by Roongate. David Moyes was so incensed by Wayne’s autobiography serialisation that he’s started legal proceedings. I guess Rooney will soon be sporting a new t-shirt; ‘Once a blue, always a blue - unless I feel the need to justify leaving for a bigger club by completely destabilising them’. Liverpool should be backed at 11/10 to leave Goodison Park with the Scouse bragging-rights.
Steven Gerrard came out with the most entertaining one-liner since Pete Doherty this week. He joked, “Peter Crouch is a great finisher; i hope he beats Bobby Charlton's record.” Well, i hope to one day sleep with Maria Sharapova, but it ain’t gonna happen…again. To be fair to Gerrard, the big man is on fire; even I’m considering backing him at 13/2 to net the opener.
The revelation that Gallas threatened to score an own goal if Chelsea picked him against his will has even got the wife upset. I overheard her in a conversation with her mother: “That’s one small Willy” she complained, and she’s right. The signing of Gallas and Baptista finally adds much needed steel to the Gunners armoury, Arsenal are available at 4/11 to see off Middlesbrough, please meet the weekend nap.
Thierry Henry loves facing the Boro, of the incredible 16 goals that Middlesbrough have conceded in their last three visits to Arsenal in the Premiership, Terrence has bagged 6 of them. They say form is temporary, but class is permanent, (If that’s true, where’s Pele now?) Henry is 14/1 to net a hat-trick.
Man U have started the season superbly, but their decision not to replace Van the man in the transfer window could leave Fergie red-faced. (Looking on the bright side, his nose will fit right in.) While Man U are lightweight up front, Spurs have more quality than Ben Thatcher could shake an elbow at. Defoe, Keane, Berbatov and Mido are all top-drawer operators, my value sensor has sniffed out the draw at 11/4.
Neil Warnock broke the bank on deadline day, bringing in Kazim-Richards for a fee believed to be in the region of £150,000, that’s a pretty poor region. Blackburn have visited Bramall Lane twice in the Premiership, they left with all three points on both occasions. Chance may have no memory, but Sheffield United have no players; the Rovers are the call at 7/4.
Paul Jewell will be delighted that Emile Heskey has opened his account, although, if he really thought about it, it’s probably a bad thing that 33% of his total goals for the season are in the bag already. Wigan travel to a revitalised Pompey, I can’t see any other result than a home win, a juicy 5/6 is on offer.
While Chelsea’s attack on Gallas did Willy little favours, it hardly promoted the Champions in a positive light. My favourite line from the press release was the accusation that he was ‘hawking himself to the highest bidder’, there’s a kettle looking to tool a pot somewhere. Charlton will be demolished at the Bridge, take advantage at 1/5.
The acc of the week:
The accer this week is so assured; it would take a team of women working around the clock to even begin to demoralise it. Liverpool, Arsenal, Bolton, Portsmouth and Blackburn are the selections, the payout is a shade under 20/1.
The weekend specials:
“Nic is in a twist” - Anelka to be sent off 25/1
“Mido's touch” - Mido to score at any time 3/1
“Hey Mascherano” - Javier Mascherano to be booked 7/4
“Auf Wiedersehen, Pet” - Stilian Petrov to be sent off 40/1
“All mouth and no Scousers” - A player to be sent off in the Merseyside derby 2/1
The quote of the week
“At this stage, no proceedings have been issued against Wayne Rooney, for various reasons. The book has got to be fully read and David Moyes has to consider whether that is something he wants to do.”
That’s too much to ask of any one man.
The lay man:
People are lining up to back Man U at 8/15 on the exchanges. Spurs are unbeaten in their last two trips to Old Trafford, let’s accommodate them.
Weekend Betting:
Everton v Liverpool Saturday 9th September 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Everton 3/1
Draw 9/4
Liverpool 11/10
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Peter Crouch to score with a header 9/2
Arsenal v Middlesbrough Saturday 9th September 15.00
Arsenal 4/11
Draw 7/2
Middlesbrough 9/1
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Arsenal to win 4-0 16/1
Bolton v Watford Saturday 9th September 15.00
Bolton 4/6
Draw 12/5
Watford 5/1
Get on: Bolton
Match Special:
Anelka to score two or more goals 9/2
Chelsea v Charlton Saturday 9th September 15.00
Chelsea 1/5
Draw 5/1
Charlton 16/1
Get on: Chelsea
Match Special:
Shevchenko to score a hat-trick 14/1
Newcastle v Fulham Saturday 9th September 15.00
Newcastle 4/5
Draw 12/5
Fulham 4/1
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 6/1
Portsmouth v Wigan Saturday 9th September 15.00
Portsmouth 5/6
Draw 9/4
Wigan 4/1
Get on: Portsmouth
Match Special:
Portsmouth to win and keep a clean sheet 2/1
Sheff Utd v Blackburn Saturday 9th September 15.00
Sheff Utd 13/8
Draw 9/4
Blackburn 7/4
Get on: Blackburn
Match Special:
McCarthy to score at any time 9/4
Man Utd v Tottenham Saturday 9th September 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Man Utd 1/2
Draw 11/4
Tottenham 13/2
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Carrick to be booked 7/2
West Ham v Aston Villa Sunday 10th September 16.00 Live on Sky
West Ham 6/5
Draw 11/5
Aston Villa 5/2
Get on: West Ham
Match Special:
Tevez to score the first goal 13/2
Reading v Man City Monday 11th September 20.00 Live on Sky
Reading 7/5
Draw 9/4
Man City 21/10
Get on: Reading
Match Special:
Reading to score three or more goals 5/1
Copyright (c) Gerry McDonnell & soccerphile.com
Thursday, August 24, 2006
A Ferd in the hand is worth two on the box
There’s only one thing in life that’s more enjoyable than an evening with the wife and kids, and that’s an evening without the wife and kids. Whenever I’m lucky enough to be rid of the evil one and her two clones, I like to relax in front of the box with a couple of lagers watching quality television programming.
As the free-view doesn’t kick off until 11:00pm, my programme of choice is ideally football related and entertaining, thus immediately ruling Soccer AM out of the equation. With the exception of the imperious Jeff Stelling show on a Saturday afternoon, other programmes struggle to match my demanding criteria, so you can imagine my unconfined joy when news broke that Rio Ferdinand was set to enter the world of light entertainment.
His wind-up show was a disappointment, the sketch where he ‘murked’ the drug testers by forgetting to turn up was left out, as was the one where he ‘murked’ the Man U board by refusing to sign a contract until their wage offer rose from £100,000 to £110,000 a week. I imagine the sketch where he was going to ‘murk’ Martin Jol by pretending to bid £18m for Michael Carrick was pulled for being too unrealistic.
Rio has been offered another bite at the TV cherry, the premise being that Ferd and his crew will ‘pimp’ up the pads of….fellow millionaire professional footballers. I literally can wait.
Talking of pimping, Wayne Rooney misses United’s match against Watford due to the FA upholding a ridiculous ban for a red card in a friendly. Rooney’s agent hit back by threatening to withhold Wayne’s image rights; I can only guess that Rooney suggested ‘upping the ante’ and Stretford misunderstood. United have won their last six against Watford, the Mancs are the weekend nap at 2/5.
With Rooney banned, best pal Cristiano ‘more dives than Glasgow’ Ronaldo should be backed to net the opener. Ronnie’s been priced up at 15/2, a price so big I almost fell over.
Watford were absolutely robbed by the ref at Goodison Park, they’re now playing Man U, they’ll be lucky if they’re awarded a throw in. Watford won’t score, take 21/20 about a United win coupled with a clean sheet.
Arsenal have treated Man City in recent years like Ben Thatcher treats Pedro Mendes, they’ve pounded on them unmercifully. (Mendes is not the first person to be unable to work thanks to Thatcher.) Arsenal have left Manchester with all three points on their last eight visits, you’ve got to fancy the Gunners at 8/11 to reach number nine. Someone’s going to take a pommeling at the hands of the Wenger boys soon, there’s a decent chance it’ll be Thatcher’s mob.
Blackburn players do enjoy a challenge. The wild Rovers had two players sent off on the opening day, that’s virtually a friendly for Savage & co. Chelsea were turned over at Ewood Park last season, a repeat is out of the question. A wounded Chelsea are a great bet at 4/7 to make amends for their Boro bashing.
I had my fingers burnt by Liverpool last week, but the Reds can make amends at home to West Ham. Liverpool’s attacking options were limited when Stevie G snatched the FA Cup from the Hammers’ grasp in May, but now they have three quality marksmen and Peter Crouch competing for a start. The Pool should be backed at a healthy 1/2.
Fulham look a promising investment at home to Sheff U at 10/11. Chris Coleman’s battlers won the same amount of home matches as Manchester United last season, only a disastrous campaign on the road ensured a 12th place finish. I’m a little worried about the Malbranque situation, Chris Coleman appears to be cutting off his nose to spite his face; that’s only a good idea if you’re Iain Dowie. If the Cottagers come anywhere near replicating last season’s home form, we’re venturing towards decent stake territory.
David O’Leary’s lackadaisical attitude ensured the Villa team rolled over and died away at Arsenal in a 5-0 defeat just four months ago, yet under Martin O’Neill, the same group of players were able to fight like the wife ‘when the decorators visit’ to nick a commendable draw. The Villa are worth a bet at 7/5 at home to Newcastle, simply because of the O’Neill factor.
I’m a great believer in positive thinking. There’s an old saying that I hold dear, ‘If at first you don’t succeed, then Paul Jewell will probably buy you’. You shouldn’t kick a dead dog, but I can’t help but feel that the signing of Heskey will prove disastrous for Wigan. Reading have started the season well, they’re worth a second look at 3/1 to leave the JJB with three points.
The acc of the week:
The accer this week is so certain, that even under extreme torture it would refuse to budge. Liverpool, Fulham, Tottenham, Arsenal and Aston Villa are the good things, you’re looking at a payout of 17/1.
The weekend specials:
“A little Camp?” - Ivan Campo to score with a header 20/1
“A professional Fowl” - Robbie Fowler to score a penalty 6/1
“Bull's high” - Jimmy Bullard to score with a header 14/1
“A very dirty Vid” - Mark Viduka to be sent off 20/1
The quote of the week:
“He’s not intelligent.”
Jose ‘all tact’ Mourinho, when asked about Michael Essien.
The lay man:
Sheff Utd are begging to be laid at 10/3 for their trip to the Cottage, this is possibly how the expression ‘easy money’ originated. Help yourself at Betfair, Backandlay or Betdaq.
Weekend Betting:
Liverpool v West Ham Saturday 26th August 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 10/3
West Ham 15/2
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Bellamy to score two or more goals 5/1
Charlton v Bolton Saturday 26th August 15.00
Charlton 6/4
Draw 9/4
Bolton 9/5
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Fulham v Sheff Utd Saturday 26th August 15.00
Fulham 10/11
Draw 9/4
Sheff Utd 3/1
Get on: Fulham
Match Special:
Papa Bouba Diop to score with a header 10/1
Tottenham v Everton Saturday 26th August 15.00
Tottenham 4/5
Draw 12/5
Everton 4/1
Get on: Tottenham
Match Special:
Berbatov and Keane both to score 13/2
Watford v Man Utd Saturday 26th August 15.00
Watford 15/2
Draw 10/3
Man Utd 2/5
Get on: Man Utd
Match Special:
Ronaldo to score direct from a free-kick 8/1
Wigan v Reading Saturday 26th August 15.00
Wigan Evs
Draw 9/4
Reading 3/1
Get on: Reading
Match Special:
Lita to score the only goal of the game 50/1
Man City v Arsenal Saturday 26th August 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Man City 9/2
Draw 13/5
Arsenal 8/11
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Henry to score a hat-trick 25/1
Aston Villa v Newcastle Sunday 27th August 14.00 Live on Sky
Aston Villa 7/5
Draw 9/4
Newcastle 2/1
Get on: Aston Villa
Match Special:
Angel to score with a header 6/1
Blackburn v Chelsea Sunday 27th August 16.00 Live on Sky
Blackburn 6/1
Draw 11/4
Chelsea 4/7
Get on: Chelsea
Match Special:
John Terry to score at any time 5/1
Middlesbrough v Portsmouth Monday 28th August 20.00 Live on Sky
Middlesbrough 5/4
Draw 5/2
Portsmouth 11/4
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Boateng to be booked 6/4
As the free-view doesn’t kick off until 11:00pm, my programme of choice is ideally football related and entertaining, thus immediately ruling Soccer AM out of the equation. With the exception of the imperious Jeff Stelling show on a Saturday afternoon, other programmes struggle to match my demanding criteria, so you can imagine my unconfined joy when news broke that Rio Ferdinand was set to enter the world of light entertainment.
His wind-up show was a disappointment, the sketch where he ‘murked’ the drug testers by forgetting to turn up was left out, as was the one where he ‘murked’ the Man U board by refusing to sign a contract until their wage offer rose from £100,000 to £110,000 a week. I imagine the sketch where he was going to ‘murk’ Martin Jol by pretending to bid £18m for Michael Carrick was pulled for being too unrealistic.
Rio has been offered another bite at the TV cherry, the premise being that Ferd and his crew will ‘pimp’ up the pads of….fellow millionaire professional footballers. I literally can wait.
Talking of pimping, Wayne Rooney misses United’s match against Watford due to the FA upholding a ridiculous ban for a red card in a friendly. Rooney’s agent hit back by threatening to withhold Wayne’s image rights; I can only guess that Rooney suggested ‘upping the ante’ and Stretford misunderstood. United have won their last six against Watford, the Mancs are the weekend nap at 2/5.
With Rooney banned, best pal Cristiano ‘more dives than Glasgow’ Ronaldo should be backed to net the opener. Ronnie’s been priced up at 15/2, a price so big I almost fell over.
Watford were absolutely robbed by the ref at Goodison Park, they’re now playing Man U, they’ll be lucky if they’re awarded a throw in. Watford won’t score, take 21/20 about a United win coupled with a clean sheet.
Arsenal have treated Man City in recent years like Ben Thatcher treats Pedro Mendes, they’ve pounded on them unmercifully. (Mendes is not the first person to be unable to work thanks to Thatcher.) Arsenal have left Manchester with all three points on their last eight visits, you’ve got to fancy the Gunners at 8/11 to reach number nine. Someone’s going to take a pommeling at the hands of the Wenger boys soon, there’s a decent chance it’ll be Thatcher’s mob.
Blackburn players do enjoy a challenge. The wild Rovers had two players sent off on the opening day, that’s virtually a friendly for Savage & co. Chelsea were turned over at Ewood Park last season, a repeat is out of the question. A wounded Chelsea are a great bet at 4/7 to make amends for their Boro bashing.
I had my fingers burnt by Liverpool last week, but the Reds can make amends at home to West Ham. Liverpool’s attacking options were limited when Stevie G snatched the FA Cup from the Hammers’ grasp in May, but now they have three quality marksmen and Peter Crouch competing for a start. The Pool should be backed at a healthy 1/2.
Fulham look a promising investment at home to Sheff U at 10/11. Chris Coleman’s battlers won the same amount of home matches as Manchester United last season, only a disastrous campaign on the road ensured a 12th place finish. I’m a little worried about the Malbranque situation, Chris Coleman appears to be cutting off his nose to spite his face; that’s only a good idea if you’re Iain Dowie. If the Cottagers come anywhere near replicating last season’s home form, we’re venturing towards decent stake territory.
David O’Leary’s lackadaisical attitude ensured the Villa team rolled over and died away at Arsenal in a 5-0 defeat just four months ago, yet under Martin O’Neill, the same group of players were able to fight like the wife ‘when the decorators visit’ to nick a commendable draw. The Villa are worth a bet at 7/5 at home to Newcastle, simply because of the O’Neill factor.
I’m a great believer in positive thinking. There’s an old saying that I hold dear, ‘If at first you don’t succeed, then Paul Jewell will probably buy you’. You shouldn’t kick a dead dog, but I can’t help but feel that the signing of Heskey will prove disastrous for Wigan. Reading have started the season well, they’re worth a second look at 3/1 to leave the JJB with three points.
The acc of the week:
The accer this week is so certain, that even under extreme torture it would refuse to budge. Liverpool, Fulham, Tottenham, Arsenal and Aston Villa are the good things, you’re looking at a payout of 17/1.
The weekend specials:
“A little Camp?” - Ivan Campo to score with a header 20/1
“A professional Fowl” - Robbie Fowler to score a penalty 6/1
“Bull's high” - Jimmy Bullard to score with a header 14/1
“A very dirty Vid” - Mark Viduka to be sent off 20/1
The quote of the week:
“He’s not intelligent.”
Jose ‘all tact’ Mourinho, when asked about Michael Essien.
The lay man:
Sheff Utd are begging to be laid at 10/3 for their trip to the Cottage, this is possibly how the expression ‘easy money’ originated. Help yourself at Betfair, Backandlay or Betdaq.
Weekend Betting:
Liverpool v West Ham Saturday 26th August 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 10/3
West Ham 15/2
Get on: Liverpool
Match Special:
Bellamy to score two or more goals 5/1
Charlton v Bolton Saturday 26th August 15.00
Charlton 6/4
Draw 9/4
Bolton 9/5
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Fulham v Sheff Utd Saturday 26th August 15.00
Fulham 10/11
Draw 9/4
Sheff Utd 3/1
Get on: Fulham
Match Special:
Papa Bouba Diop to score with a header 10/1
Tottenham v Everton Saturday 26th August 15.00
Tottenham 4/5
Draw 12/5
Everton 4/1
Get on: Tottenham
Match Special:
Berbatov and Keane both to score 13/2
Watford v Man Utd Saturday 26th August 15.00
Watford 15/2
Draw 10/3
Man Utd 2/5
Get on: Man Utd
Match Special:
Ronaldo to score direct from a free-kick 8/1
Wigan v Reading Saturday 26th August 15.00
Wigan Evs
Draw 9/4
Reading 3/1
Get on: Reading
Match Special:
Lita to score the only goal of the game 50/1
Man City v Arsenal Saturday 26th August 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Man City 9/2
Draw 13/5
Arsenal 8/11
Get on: Arsenal
Match Special:
Henry to score a hat-trick 25/1
Aston Villa v Newcastle Sunday 27th August 14.00 Live on Sky
Aston Villa 7/5
Draw 9/4
Newcastle 2/1
Get on: Aston Villa
Match Special:
Angel to score with a header 6/1
Blackburn v Chelsea Sunday 27th August 16.00 Live on Sky
Blackburn 6/1
Draw 11/4
Chelsea 4/7
Get on: Chelsea
Match Special:
John Terry to score at any time 5/1
Middlesbrough v Portsmouth Monday 28th August 20.00 Live on Sky
Middlesbrough 5/4
Draw 5/2
Portsmouth 11/4
Get on: Draw
Match Special:
Boateng to be booked 6/4
Thursday, June 8, 2006
The Player, The Coach and His Boss
So Wayne Rooney is going to the World Cup but do Manchester United want him there?
Absolutely no chance, is the answer. Rooney's scan declared the bone healed but as with all complex fractures the bone is only one part of the story and Sir Alex Ferguson is desperate for the player to remain in Manchester and rehabilitate. But FIFA rules stipulate that the national team takes precedent and Rooney rejoined the England squad.
After all the media speculation, wrangling and sackings Wayne Rooney will be part of England's World Cup squad no matter how much Fergie dislikes it. The most talented Englishman of his generation is at the centre of a fierce club versus country row, which threatens to obliterate relationships between the national FA and the land's biggest team. The argument, which came to a boil inside a private health clinic in Cheshire last night, centres on how fit Rooney actually is. United believe that he has not healed sufficiently to take part in the tournament, while England are desperate to gamble of the Red's prize asset.
In the end the FA insisted on calling in a FIFA doctor to pronounce that the player could be part of the squad and under FIFA rules United has no choice but to release the player. It also prompted a furious phone call between Sir Alex Ferguson, who is looking after the interests of Manchester United, and Sven Goran Eriksson who desperately trying to salvage his reputation in the motherland of football.
So victory to the FA then? Certainly that is the mood inside the camp if Leif Sward, the England doctor's, arm waving, fist pumping triumphalist return to Germany is anything to go by. The player is delighted, naturally, that he's part of the squad - even if it is against the advice of at least some of the medical community
But the presence of Manchester United's lawyers inside the medical centre while the results were being assessed is an ominous sign. This is a row that could get ugly, very ugly. United are already backing Charleroi's case against the Moroccan FA, in which they are claiming compensation for a player injured on international duty that could have a significant impact on how litigious the Manchester club gets. The ultimate scenario being that Wayne Rooney re-fractures the bone and is out for a considerable length of time prompting United to seek millions in compensation.
Copyright (c) Ranter & Soccerphile.com
World Cup News
Absolutely no chance, is the answer. Rooney's scan declared the bone healed but as with all complex fractures the bone is only one part of the story and Sir Alex Ferguson is desperate for the player to remain in Manchester and rehabilitate. But FIFA rules stipulate that the national team takes precedent and Rooney rejoined the England squad.
After all the media speculation, wrangling and sackings Wayne Rooney will be part of England's World Cup squad no matter how much Fergie dislikes it. The most talented Englishman of his generation is at the centre of a fierce club versus country row, which threatens to obliterate relationships between the national FA and the land's biggest team. The argument, which came to a boil inside a private health clinic in Cheshire last night, centres on how fit Rooney actually is. United believe that he has not healed sufficiently to take part in the tournament, while England are desperate to gamble of the Red's prize asset.
In the end the FA insisted on calling in a FIFA doctor to pronounce that the player could be part of the squad and under FIFA rules United has no choice but to release the player. It also prompted a furious phone call between Sir Alex Ferguson, who is looking after the interests of Manchester United, and Sven Goran Eriksson who desperately trying to salvage his reputation in the motherland of football.
So victory to the FA then? Certainly that is the mood inside the camp if Leif Sward, the England doctor's, arm waving, fist pumping triumphalist return to Germany is anything to go by. The player is delighted, naturally, that he's part of the squad - even if it is against the advice of at least some of the medical community
But the presence of Manchester United's lawyers inside the medical centre while the results were being assessed is an ominous sign. This is a row that could get ugly, very ugly. United are already backing Charleroi's case against the Moroccan FA, in which they are claiming compensation for a player injured on international duty that could have a significant impact on how litigious the Manchester club gets. The ultimate scenario being that Wayne Rooney re-fractures the bone and is out for a considerable length of time prompting United to seek millions in compensation.
Copyright (c) Ranter & Soccerphile.com
World Cup News
Thursday, April 6, 2006
Cesc, Drogs and Rock and Roll
Working on a Sunday is comparable to sleeping with the wife, it occurs rarely and it’s never enjoyable. The gaffer is aware of my reticence, whenever circumstances demand that I appear on the Sabbath he throws me double time and a day in lieu, I’m reasonably happy with that, but Louise has just handed her notice in. As a result, I’ll be spending this Sunday watching three live Premiership matches.
Chelsea v West Ham kicks off the action at midday and an early shock could be on the cards. Man United are breathing down the champion’s necks and Chelsea are feeling the pressure; they’re currently wobbling like a jelly on a drunken Sumo wrestler.
There’s a definite cloud over the Bridge, after being booed by his own supporters, a depressed Didier Drogba is reportedly considering a move away from the club. Imagine that, Drogba, down. There’s a real case for backing the Hammers at 8/1 against a choking Chelsea, but a lay of the Champions at around the 3/10 mark on the exchanges is a more practical option. It’s practically in already.
Super Sunday continues when Liverpool host Bolton, and this one could be tasty. If my memory serves me correctly, Stevie Gerrard used Kevin Nolan’s back as a trampoline earlier in the season; you would think he could afford his own. A sending off in the match is available at 10/3, that’s definitely worth a small interest.
Robbie Fowler has had a good week, after overtaking Kenny Dalglish in Liverpool’s all-time goal scorer list; Rafa has confirmed that a couple more goals could earn him a new contract at the club. The scally legend has a lot to play for, and like a dyslexic hippy; i’m a big believer in ‘Fowler power’. The Pool should be backed at 1/2 to take the three points; Robbie should be backed at 11/10 to get on the scoresheet.
After a couple of tasty starters, the live action reaches a crescendo when Arsenal travel to Old Trafford. This fixture has finished goalless on the last two meetings, but that’s about to change. Arsenal are currently in a purple patch, and United’s patch is arguably even purpler, it’s a Fergie’s nose patch. There will be goals in this one, and United want it that little bit more. They’re good looking bets at even money.
Van Nistelrooy started on the bench last week, came on, went to ground easily, and then banged in his 150th goal for the club, it was a typical Van the man performance. Nistelrooy and Arsenal have a little history, he’s a 9/2 shot to score the last goal against his old mates. The British press have had Cesc on their brain all week, but United have a half decent youngster of their own, his name’s Rooney, and he can play ball. Wayne likes the big occasion, he’s a 6/4 shot to score at any time.
Martin Jol’s decision to continuously play Mido ahead of Jermain Defoe leaves me perplexed. As I often reassure the wife, there’s nothing wrong with having two little ones up front. Spurs play hosts to a Man City team who still have their manager’s savage criticism ringing through their ears, an improved performance from City is an absolute certainty; 7/2 screams value.
The Boro v Newcastle match reminds me of the time I holidayed in the Orient, there’s every chance it might end up in a tie. The last three meets between these two have finished all square, a trend that looks set to continue. 11/5 is on offer, let’s rock and roll.
The weekend specials:
“I should be so lucky” - Portsmouth to keep a clean sheet 15/8
“All you need is Love” - Lovenkrands to score and Rangers to win 1-0 20/1
“Johnny be good” - John Terry to be booked 11/4
“Shay a little prayer” - Newcastle to keep a clean sheet 15/8
“Let's talk about Cesc” - Fabregas to score two or more goals 25/1
Quote of the week:
“Every time I pull on the shirt, I give 120%.”
Jermain Defoe puts all other professional footballers to shame, they only put in 110%.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
A quick perusal through the Premiership’s top 20 goal scorers this season makes interesting reading; the most lethal striker is…Luke Moore. Aston Villa’s rising star scores a goal every 1.88 shots. To put that stat in perspective, Rooney’s ratio is 1 in 4.85, Lampard scores 1 in 5.80.
Acc of the week:
Man City, Fulham, Aston Villa and Liverpool are all good looking bets on their own, throw them all together, you’ve got a gorgeous little 32/1 accer.
Weekend Betting:
Tottenham v Man City Saturday 8th April 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Tottenham 4/6
Draw 12/5
Man City 7/2
Get on: Man City
Both teams go in to the match on the back of a disappointing defeat. Tottenham struggled to see off West Brom in their last home match, 7/2 about City stands out.
Match Special:
Man City to score two or more goals 3/1
Charlton v Everton Saturday 8th April 15.00
Charlton 5/4
Draw 9/4
Everton 7/4
Get on: Charlton
Charlton are unbeaten at home this year; Everton are winless in five on the road. The Toffeemen failed to beat Sunderland last week, at home.
Match Special:
Darren Bent to score the only goal of the game 25/1
Portsmouth v Blackburn Saturday 8th April 15.00
Portsmouth 6/4
Draw 11/5
Blackburn 6/4
Get on: Portsmouth
It’s three wins out of three for Pompey; Blackburn have lost five of their last six matches away from Ewood Park.
Match Special:
Mendes to score at any time 4/1
Sunderland v Fulham Saturday 8th April 15.00
Sunderland 13/8
Draw 11/5
Fulham 11/8
Get on: Fulham
Sunderland have not won a home match all season, Fulham have failed to win away. The Mackems have only found the net in two of their previous nine home matches, Fulham have scored in five of their last six away games. An ‘O’ must go, it’ll be Fulham’s.
Match Special:
Fulham to keep a clean sheet 7/4
Wigan v Birmingham Saturday 8th April 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Wigan 5/6
Draw 5/2
Birmingham 5/2
Get on: Birmingham
Wigan have lost their last three in front of their own supporters; City have beaten Bolton and held Chelsea in their last two games.
Match Special:
Birmingham to win 1-0 8/1
Aston Villa v West Brom Sunday 9th April 12.00
Aston Villa 11/10
Draw 2/1
West Brom 9/4
Get on: Aston Villa
Villa have taken four points from their last two home matches (against fellow strugglers Pompey and Fulham). The Albion have lost their last three, and they’ve never beaten the Villa in the Premiership.
Match Special:
Steven Davis to score at any time 4/1
Chelsea v West Ham Sunday 9th April 12.00 Live on Sky
Chelsea 2/7
Draw 7/2
West Ham 8/1
Get on: West Ham
Four points out of nine constitutes a bad run of form for Chelsea; the Hammers have won five of their last eight away games, including a triumph at Highbury. I’ve seen worse 8/1 shots.
Match Special:
Harewood to score the only goal of the game 90/1
Liverpool v Bolton Sunday 9th April 14.00 Live on Sky
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 12/5
Bolton 11/2
Get on: Liverpool
Liverpool have won five on the bounce, scoring 20 goals. Bolton have lost their last three, conceding seven times. It’s been over 50 years since Bolton won a league match at Anfield.
Match Special:
Liverpool to win and keep a clean sheet 11/10
Middlesbrough v Newcastle Sunday 9th April 15.00
Middlesbrough 6/4
Draw 11/5
Newcastle 6/4
Get on: Draw
There’s a history of draws in this fixture, with both teams being consistently inconsistent, another tied match is the sensible conclusion.
Match Special:
Match to finish 2-2 14/1
Man Utd v Arsenal Sunday 9th April 16.00 Live on Sky
Man Utd Evs
Draw 9/4
Arsenal 9/4
Get on: Man Utd
The two hot teams in the Premiership collide, it’s eight consecutive victories for Man U, while Arsenal have handed out four beatings on the bounce. Either team could win, at the available prices; the home team receives the nod.
Match Special:
Any player to be sent off 13/5
Chelsea v West Ham kicks off the action at midday and an early shock could be on the cards. Man United are breathing down the champion’s necks and Chelsea are feeling the pressure; they’re currently wobbling like a jelly on a drunken Sumo wrestler.
There’s a definite cloud over the Bridge, after being booed by his own supporters, a depressed Didier Drogba is reportedly considering a move away from the club. Imagine that, Drogba, down. There’s a real case for backing the Hammers at 8/1 against a choking Chelsea, but a lay of the Champions at around the 3/10 mark on the exchanges is a more practical option. It’s practically in already.
Super Sunday continues when Liverpool host Bolton, and this one could be tasty. If my memory serves me correctly, Stevie Gerrard used Kevin Nolan’s back as a trampoline earlier in the season; you would think he could afford his own. A sending off in the match is available at 10/3, that’s definitely worth a small interest.
Robbie Fowler has had a good week, after overtaking Kenny Dalglish in Liverpool’s all-time goal scorer list; Rafa has confirmed that a couple more goals could earn him a new contract at the club. The scally legend has a lot to play for, and like a dyslexic hippy; i’m a big believer in ‘Fowler power’. The Pool should be backed at 1/2 to take the three points; Robbie should be backed at 11/10 to get on the scoresheet.
After a couple of tasty starters, the live action reaches a crescendo when Arsenal travel to Old Trafford. This fixture has finished goalless on the last two meetings, but that’s about to change. Arsenal are currently in a purple patch, and United’s patch is arguably even purpler, it’s a Fergie’s nose patch. There will be goals in this one, and United want it that little bit more. They’re good looking bets at even money.
Van Nistelrooy started on the bench last week, came on, went to ground easily, and then banged in his 150th goal for the club, it was a typical Van the man performance. Nistelrooy and Arsenal have a little history, he’s a 9/2 shot to score the last goal against his old mates. The British press have had Cesc on their brain all week, but United have a half decent youngster of their own, his name’s Rooney, and he can play ball. Wayne likes the big occasion, he’s a 6/4 shot to score at any time.
Martin Jol’s decision to continuously play Mido ahead of Jermain Defoe leaves me perplexed. As I often reassure the wife, there’s nothing wrong with having two little ones up front. Spurs play hosts to a Man City team who still have their manager’s savage criticism ringing through their ears, an improved performance from City is an absolute certainty; 7/2 screams value.
The Boro v Newcastle match reminds me of the time I holidayed in the Orient, there’s every chance it might end up in a tie. The last three meets between these two have finished all square, a trend that looks set to continue. 11/5 is on offer, let’s rock and roll.
The weekend specials:
“I should be so lucky” - Portsmouth to keep a clean sheet 15/8
“All you need is Love” - Lovenkrands to score and Rangers to win 1-0 20/1
“Johnny be good” - John Terry to be booked 11/4
“Shay a little prayer” - Newcastle to keep a clean sheet 15/8
“Let's talk about Cesc” - Fabregas to score two or more goals 25/1
Quote of the week:
“Every time I pull on the shirt, I give 120%.”
Jermain Defoe puts all other professional footballers to shame, they only put in 110%.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
A quick perusal through the Premiership’s top 20 goal scorers this season makes interesting reading; the most lethal striker is…Luke Moore. Aston Villa’s rising star scores a goal every 1.88 shots. To put that stat in perspective, Rooney’s ratio is 1 in 4.85, Lampard scores 1 in 5.80.
Acc of the week:
Man City, Fulham, Aston Villa and Liverpool are all good looking bets on their own, throw them all together, you’ve got a gorgeous little 32/1 accer.
Weekend Betting:
Tottenham v Man City Saturday 8th April 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Tottenham 4/6
Draw 12/5
Man City 7/2
Get on: Man City
Both teams go in to the match on the back of a disappointing defeat. Tottenham struggled to see off West Brom in their last home match, 7/2 about City stands out.
Match Special:
Man City to score two or more goals 3/1
Charlton v Everton Saturday 8th April 15.00
Charlton 5/4
Draw 9/4
Everton 7/4
Get on: Charlton
Charlton are unbeaten at home this year; Everton are winless in five on the road. The Toffeemen failed to beat Sunderland last week, at home.
Match Special:
Darren Bent to score the only goal of the game 25/1
Portsmouth v Blackburn Saturday 8th April 15.00
Portsmouth 6/4
Draw 11/5
Blackburn 6/4
Get on: Portsmouth
It’s three wins out of three for Pompey; Blackburn have lost five of their last six matches away from Ewood Park.
Match Special:
Mendes to score at any time 4/1
Sunderland v Fulham Saturday 8th April 15.00
Sunderland 13/8
Draw 11/5
Fulham 11/8
Get on: Fulham
Sunderland have not won a home match all season, Fulham have failed to win away. The Mackems have only found the net in two of their previous nine home matches, Fulham have scored in five of their last six away games. An ‘O’ must go, it’ll be Fulham’s.
Match Special:
Fulham to keep a clean sheet 7/4
Wigan v Birmingham Saturday 8th April 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Wigan 5/6
Draw 5/2
Birmingham 5/2
Get on: Birmingham
Wigan have lost their last three in front of their own supporters; City have beaten Bolton and held Chelsea in their last two games.
Match Special:
Birmingham to win 1-0 8/1
Aston Villa v West Brom Sunday 9th April 12.00
Aston Villa 11/10
Draw 2/1
West Brom 9/4
Get on: Aston Villa
Villa have taken four points from their last two home matches (against fellow strugglers Pompey and Fulham). The Albion have lost their last three, and they’ve never beaten the Villa in the Premiership.
Match Special:
Steven Davis to score at any time 4/1
Chelsea v West Ham Sunday 9th April 12.00 Live on Sky
Chelsea 2/7
Draw 7/2
West Ham 8/1
Get on: West Ham
Four points out of nine constitutes a bad run of form for Chelsea; the Hammers have won five of their last eight away games, including a triumph at Highbury. I’ve seen worse 8/1 shots.
Match Special:
Harewood to score the only goal of the game 90/1
Liverpool v Bolton Sunday 9th April 14.00 Live on Sky
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 12/5
Bolton 11/2
Get on: Liverpool
Liverpool have won five on the bounce, scoring 20 goals. Bolton have lost their last three, conceding seven times. It’s been over 50 years since Bolton won a league match at Anfield.
Match Special:
Liverpool to win and keep a clean sheet 11/10
Middlesbrough v Newcastle Sunday 9th April 15.00
Middlesbrough 6/4
Draw 11/5
Newcastle 6/4
Get on: Draw
There’s a history of draws in this fixture, with both teams being consistently inconsistent, another tied match is the sensible conclusion.
Match Special:
Match to finish 2-2 14/1
Man Utd v Arsenal Sunday 9th April 16.00 Live on Sky
Man Utd Evs
Draw 9/4
Arsenal 9/4
Get on: Man Utd
The two hot teams in the Premiership collide, it’s eight consecutive victories for Man U, while Arsenal have handed out four beatings on the bounce. Either team could win, at the available prices; the home team receives the nod.
Match Special:
Any player to be sent off 13/5
Thursday, March 30, 2006
Dairy goes again
I often panic over nothing. When the wife trapped me into producing little gambling gurus, i did worry that they may end up with my intelligence and the wife’s looks, which would have narrowed down their future career prospects to ‘circus attraction’. Luckily, they’ve ended up with the wife’s brain, and curiously, the milkman’s looks. I say curious, as the wife and I are lactose intolerant; we have absolutely no time for lactose, and we’re not shy in speaking of our displeasure.
I bring this to your attention because little Goliath is quite bright; he’s trying to remember animals by associating them with football. Whenever Ruud Van Nistelrooy comes off the bench for Man U, he shouts ‘horsey’, as Peter Crouch heads wide he cries ‘donkey’ and when Chelsea are playing, he shakes his head and murmurs ‘cheetahs’. It seems that everyone has cottoned on to Chelsea’s lack of sportsmanship, referees will be next. Any Chelsea player to be booked for diving / simulation against Birmingham is an 11/2 shot.
Amongst all the theatrics, there will also be a game of football. You’ve got to fancy Chelsea to take three points home from St Andrew’s, but 1/3 does not represent value. Playing the correct scores can solve this conundrum; Chelsea to win either 1-0, 2-0 or 3-0 is a 5/4 shot; now we’re cooking.
Phil Neville scored a beauty last week, unfortunately, it was an own goal, against Liverpool. His brother must have been literally seething. Everton are the lucky beneficiaries of a home fixture against Sunderland; they’re 3/10, certainties doesn’t really cover it.
You can’t get rich backing Everton, so taking an interest in a bookings market may prove to be a profitable play. Duncan Ferguson is a fearsome character, like Jason Donovan, he’s done a little bird in the past. Big Dunc took only nine minutes to find his name in the book last week in the Merseyside derby; he’s a 7/2 shot to have his name taken again.
Bolton’s Reebok stadium is a genuine fortress, but Manchester United have a tasty army. Wayne Rooney missed a couple of golden chances against Birmingham last week (If they were chicken legs, he would have put them away), but remains a class act. A rested Van Nistelrooy is back in favour and the talented wobbly-legged Ronaldo has already helped himself to a pair against Bolton earlier in the season. United are available at 10/11, its time to go to war.
Unfortunately for Villa fans, Milan Baros has a get-out clause in his contract that can be triggered if a bid is received for £7 million pound or more, virtually ruling out a potential transfer. The poster declaring ‘We’re not fickle, we just don’t like you’ sums up the supporters’ frustration towards O’Leary’s inability to motivate; an Aston Villa divided amongst itself can not possibly survive at Highbury. Arsenal may rest a couple of players with one eye on Wednesday’s 2nd leg against Juventus, but in all honesty, I’d back Arsenal’s reserves at 2/7 at home to the Villa.
Jermaine Jenas didn’t enjoy his time at Newcastle, he compared his time there to living in a goldfish bowl. On a related note, it’s a fallacy that goldfish only have a memory span of a few seconds, Rio Ferdinand may have, but that’s a different kettle of fish. JJ is set for another disappointing trip to the North East, Spurs will have to settle for a draw, an 11/5 shot.
It’s been said that Middlesbrough’s Emanuel Pogatetz could start a ruck in an empty room, and still finish runner up; but don’t tell him who said it. The Austrian defender has either been booked or saw red in 14 matches this season, it’s 6/4 that he sees another card when he faces Joey Barton and Co. Man City have been depleted by injuries and suspensions, the Boro are the weekend nap at 11/4.
The weekend specials:
“Two halves at the Rovers” - Blackburn to score in both halves 2/1
“Come in handy” - Drogba to score two or more goals 4/1
“Cruising” - Stelios to score at any time 5/2
“April, Pool's day” - Liverpool to win with a clean sheet 6/5
“April, Mule's day” - Van Nistelrooy to score two or more goals 5/1
Quote of the week:
“Sometimes I dive, sometimes I stand.”
Drogba’s half right.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
If Bolton had held on to win all the matches where they had taken a lead, they would be 2nd in the Premiership.
Acc of the week:
Man Utd, Fulham, Liverpool and Middlesbrough tick all the right boxes, an acc on all four will pay 18/1.
Weekend Betting:
Birmingham v Chelsea Saturday 1st April 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Birmingham 8/1
Draw 3/1
Chelsea 1/3
Get on: Chelsea
Birmingham have lost their last three without scoring; Chelsea have won their last three without conceding. Historically, Birmingham haven’t beaten Chelsea since the 70’s. There is no argument for a home win.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 2-0 11/2
Arsenal v Aston Villa Saturday 1st April 15.00
Arsenal 2/7
Draw 7/2
Aston Villa 8/1
Get on: Arsenal
The Gunners have won their last three in the league; the Villa have earned one point out of 12.
Match Special:
Arsenal to win with a clean sheet 4/5
Bolton v Man Utd Saturday 1st April 15.00
Bolton 5/2
Draw 9/4
Man Utd 10/11
Get on: Man Utd
Bolton have conceded 10 goals in 5 games; United have won six on the bounce.
Match Special:
Rooney to score two or more goals 11/2
Everton v Sunderland Saturday 1st April 15.00
Everton 3/10
Draw 10/3
Sunderland 8/1
Get on: Everton
Everton have won their last four at Goodison Park; Sunderland have lost their last six away from home. Everton have beaten Sunderland on the last five occasions they have met.
Match Special:
Beattie to score with a header 7/2
Fulham v Portsmouth Saturday 1st April 15.00
Fulham 4/5
Draw 12/5
Portsmouth 11/4
Get on: Fulham
In the Premiership, Fulham have won five of their last six at home, while Portsmouth have lost five of their last six away. Pompey have lost on their last four visits to the Cottage.
Match Special:
Malbranque to score at any time 3/1
Newcastle v Tottenham Saturday 1st April 15.00
Newcastle 11/8
Draw 11/5
Tottenham 13/8
Get on: Draw
Newcastle have lost their last four, but it’s two wins out of three at St James’ Park. Tottenham have won three of their last four, but it’s only one win in five on the road. An interesting stat, this fixture has always produced a positive result this century, the draw’s due.
Match Special:
HT Newcastle FT Draw 14/1
West Brom v Liverpool Saturday 1st April 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
West Brom 9/2
Draw 5/2
Liverpool 8/15
Get on: Liverpool
It’s six games without a win for the Albion; Liverpool have won their last four, scoring 18 goals. The Pool have won their last nine matches against West Brom, including two 5-0’s and a 6-0. Ouch.
Match Special:
Liverpool to score four or more goals 6/1
Man City v Middlesbrough Sunday 2nd April 15.00
Man City 5/6
Draw 9/4
Middlesbrough 11/4
Get on: Middlesbrough
Man City have lost their last three; Boro have scored 13 goals in their last six league matches, winning four of them. City have never beaten the Boro at home in the Premiership.
Match Special:
Middlesbrough to score two or more goals 5/2
West Ham v Charlton Sunday 2nd April 16.00 Live on Sky
West Ham 10/11
Draw 9/4
Charlton 5/2
Get on: West Ham
The Hammers have scored two goals or more in their last seven matches at Upton Park; Charlton haven’t won a league match on their travels since October.
Match Special:
West Ham to score three or more goals 7/2
Blackburn v Wigan Monday 3rd April 20.00 Live on Sky
Blackburn 5/6
Draw 9/4
Wigan 11/4
Get on: Blackburn
Wigan have only won 2 of their last 11 matches, and they were against Sunderland and a weakened Man City. Blackburn have won their last three, they’re charging towards Europe.
Match Special:
Craig Bellamy to score at any time 5/4
I bring this to your attention because little Goliath is quite bright; he’s trying to remember animals by associating them with football. Whenever Ruud Van Nistelrooy comes off the bench for Man U, he shouts ‘horsey’, as Peter Crouch heads wide he cries ‘donkey’ and when Chelsea are playing, he shakes his head and murmurs ‘cheetahs’. It seems that everyone has cottoned on to Chelsea’s lack of sportsmanship, referees will be next. Any Chelsea player to be booked for diving / simulation against Birmingham is an 11/2 shot.
Amongst all the theatrics, there will also be a game of football. You’ve got to fancy Chelsea to take three points home from St Andrew’s, but 1/3 does not represent value. Playing the correct scores can solve this conundrum; Chelsea to win either 1-0, 2-0 or 3-0 is a 5/4 shot; now we’re cooking.
Phil Neville scored a beauty last week, unfortunately, it was an own goal, against Liverpool. His brother must have been literally seething. Everton are the lucky beneficiaries of a home fixture against Sunderland; they’re 3/10, certainties doesn’t really cover it.
You can’t get rich backing Everton, so taking an interest in a bookings market may prove to be a profitable play. Duncan Ferguson is a fearsome character, like Jason Donovan, he’s done a little bird in the past. Big Dunc took only nine minutes to find his name in the book last week in the Merseyside derby; he’s a 7/2 shot to have his name taken again.
Bolton’s Reebok stadium is a genuine fortress, but Manchester United have a tasty army. Wayne Rooney missed a couple of golden chances against Birmingham last week (If they were chicken legs, he would have put them away), but remains a class act. A rested Van Nistelrooy is back in favour and the talented wobbly-legged Ronaldo has already helped himself to a pair against Bolton earlier in the season. United are available at 10/11, its time to go to war.
Unfortunately for Villa fans, Milan Baros has a get-out clause in his contract that can be triggered if a bid is received for £7 million pound or more, virtually ruling out a potential transfer. The poster declaring ‘We’re not fickle, we just don’t like you’ sums up the supporters’ frustration towards O’Leary’s inability to motivate; an Aston Villa divided amongst itself can not possibly survive at Highbury. Arsenal may rest a couple of players with one eye on Wednesday’s 2nd leg against Juventus, but in all honesty, I’d back Arsenal’s reserves at 2/7 at home to the Villa.
Jermaine Jenas didn’t enjoy his time at Newcastle, he compared his time there to living in a goldfish bowl. On a related note, it’s a fallacy that goldfish only have a memory span of a few seconds, Rio Ferdinand may have, but that’s a different kettle of fish. JJ is set for another disappointing trip to the North East, Spurs will have to settle for a draw, an 11/5 shot.
It’s been said that Middlesbrough’s Emanuel Pogatetz could start a ruck in an empty room, and still finish runner up; but don’t tell him who said it. The Austrian defender has either been booked or saw red in 14 matches this season, it’s 6/4 that he sees another card when he faces Joey Barton and Co. Man City have been depleted by injuries and suspensions, the Boro are the weekend nap at 11/4.
The weekend specials:
“Two halves at the Rovers” - Blackburn to score in both halves 2/1
“Come in handy” - Drogba to score two or more goals 4/1
“Cruising” - Stelios to score at any time 5/2
“April, Pool's day” - Liverpool to win with a clean sheet 6/5
“April, Mule's day” - Van Nistelrooy to score two or more goals 5/1
Quote of the week:
“Sometimes I dive, sometimes I stand.”
Drogba’s half right.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
If Bolton had held on to win all the matches where they had taken a lead, they would be 2nd in the Premiership.
Acc of the week:
Man Utd, Fulham, Liverpool and Middlesbrough tick all the right boxes, an acc on all four will pay 18/1.
Weekend Betting:
Birmingham v Chelsea Saturday 1st April 12.45 Live on Premiership Plus
Birmingham 8/1
Draw 3/1
Chelsea 1/3
Get on: Chelsea
Birmingham have lost their last three without scoring; Chelsea have won their last three without conceding. Historically, Birmingham haven’t beaten Chelsea since the 70’s. There is no argument for a home win.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 2-0 11/2
Arsenal v Aston Villa Saturday 1st April 15.00
Arsenal 2/7
Draw 7/2
Aston Villa 8/1
Get on: Arsenal
The Gunners have won their last three in the league; the Villa have earned one point out of 12.
Match Special:
Arsenal to win with a clean sheet 4/5
Bolton v Man Utd Saturday 1st April 15.00
Bolton 5/2
Draw 9/4
Man Utd 10/11
Get on: Man Utd
Bolton have conceded 10 goals in 5 games; United have won six on the bounce.
Match Special:
Rooney to score two or more goals 11/2
Everton v Sunderland Saturday 1st April 15.00
Everton 3/10
Draw 10/3
Sunderland 8/1
Get on: Everton
Everton have won their last four at Goodison Park; Sunderland have lost their last six away from home. Everton have beaten Sunderland on the last five occasions they have met.
Match Special:
Beattie to score with a header 7/2
Fulham v Portsmouth Saturday 1st April 15.00
Fulham 4/5
Draw 12/5
Portsmouth 11/4
Get on: Fulham
In the Premiership, Fulham have won five of their last six at home, while Portsmouth have lost five of their last six away. Pompey have lost on their last four visits to the Cottage.
Match Special:
Malbranque to score at any time 3/1
Newcastle v Tottenham Saturday 1st April 15.00
Newcastle 11/8
Draw 11/5
Tottenham 13/8
Get on: Draw
Newcastle have lost their last four, but it’s two wins out of three at St James’ Park. Tottenham have won three of their last four, but it’s only one win in five on the road. An interesting stat, this fixture has always produced a positive result this century, the draw’s due.
Match Special:
HT Newcastle FT Draw 14/1
West Brom v Liverpool Saturday 1st April 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
West Brom 9/2
Draw 5/2
Liverpool 8/15
Get on: Liverpool
It’s six games without a win for the Albion; Liverpool have won their last four, scoring 18 goals. The Pool have won their last nine matches against West Brom, including two 5-0’s and a 6-0. Ouch.
Match Special:
Liverpool to score four or more goals 6/1
Man City v Middlesbrough Sunday 2nd April 15.00
Man City 5/6
Draw 9/4
Middlesbrough 11/4
Get on: Middlesbrough
Man City have lost their last three; Boro have scored 13 goals in their last six league matches, winning four of them. City have never beaten the Boro at home in the Premiership.
Match Special:
Middlesbrough to score two or more goals 5/2
West Ham v Charlton Sunday 2nd April 16.00 Live on Sky
West Ham 10/11
Draw 9/4
Charlton 5/2
Get on: West Ham
The Hammers have scored two goals or more in their last seven matches at Upton Park; Charlton haven’t won a league match on their travels since October.
Match Special:
West Ham to score three or more goals 7/2
Blackburn v Wigan Monday 3rd April 20.00 Live on Sky
Blackburn 5/6
Draw 9/4
Wigan 11/4
Get on: Blackburn
Wigan have only won 2 of their last 11 matches, and they were against Sunderland and a weakened Man City. Blackburn have won their last three, they’re charging towards Europe.
Match Special:
Craig Bellamy to score at any time 5/4
Thursday, January 5, 2006
Ask and Ewe Shall Receive
As tradition dictates, the first week in January is a time for New Year’s resolutions. Robbie Fowler has pledged to improve his fitness, David James has vowed to overcome his fear of crosses and Steven Gerrard has promised to stop using Bolton players as trampolines.
Sam Hammam has one wish for the New Year, a Cup upset at Highbury. The charismatic Chairman is one of the games most colourful characters, when he signed Spencer Prior for Cardiff, he inserted two clauses in the contract; Prior had to eat sheep’s testicles and engage in a physical liaison with a sheep. Prior signed the contract, but he flat out refused to eat the testicle.
Mad Sam’s new crazy gang are in for a beating at Highbury, you can back the Cup holders at 1/7.
The managerial career of Graeme Souness hangs by a thread as Michael Owen is ruled out through injury. Michael has fell to the curse of the metatarsal, Wayne Rooney, David Beckham, Steven Gerrard and Gary Neville have all been laid up with a similar injury, that reads like a who’s who of English football; and Gary Neville. All that trouble, from just a little bone. Get on the Geordies to keep Graeme in work for another week; they’re 1/6 to beat Mansfield.
It’s been a tough season for West Brom, they’re odds on to be relegated, their only quality player has handed in a transfer request, their ball-boys have ginger hair and they’ve drawn the hottest team in the Country in the FA Cup. Reading are on a 27 match unbeaten run in the Championship; they’re available at 15/8 to beat the Baggies at the Hawthorns. I have three words of advice; get stuck in.
After a few choice tackles of his own, it’s somewhat ironic that Michael Essien has been ruled out due to a nasty challenge. Maybe there’s something in this karma; there is, half a poppadom. Chelsea are 1/14 to beat Huddersfield; they will win.
Peter Crouch has shown incredible improvement in recent weeks, at the start of the season he looked abysmal, now he’s scoring like Wayne Rooney on an 18-60 holiday in Amsterdam. Steven Gerrard is currently sizzling like a pan full of bacon, you can’t oppose the Reds; a 2/5 banker.
Why is it the characters in Eastenders are always depressed at Christmas? Possibly because they’re West Ham supporters. After losing three matches on the trot, the Hammers won’t fancy a trip to Carrow Road; the form book says the Canaries are a decent investment at 9/5; I refuse to argue with a book.
Kevin Nolan would like to get something off his chest; Stevie Gerrard. He believes Bolton have an excellent chance in the FA Cup this season, I agree. Bolton at 28’s, Villa at 33’s and Reading at 200’s are all worth a small each way tinkle.
With the Lions, Tigers, Owls and Rams all in action, the weekend specials have gone a bit animal.
“A Stag party” – Mansfield to score a goal Evs
“A bald Eagle” – Andy Johnson (Palace) to score with a header 4/1
“A Canary dwarf” – Dean Ashton to score with a header 7/1
“An old Deer” – Wayne Rooney to score a hat-trick 9/1
Quote of the week:
“If I’m at home, yes, I will see it, but maybe my wife would like to go somewhere. It all depends on my wife.”
Jose Mourinho (surprisingly) is mortal.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
The team with the sloppiest finishing in the Premiership is...Aston Villa. Less than 35% of Villa’s attempts trouble the goalkeeper.
Acc of the week:
Aston Villa, Everton, Bolton, Liverpool and Tottenham form the weekend accer, it pays out at 16/1.
Weekend Betting:
Hull v Aston Villa Saturday 7th January 12.30 Live on BBC
Hull 5/2
Draw 9/4
Aston Villa 10/11
Get on: Aston Villa
Villa have drawn Hull in the FA Cup on four previous occasions, the Villa qualified every time. Villa are unbeaten over the Xmas period, away win.
Match Special:
Villa to score three or more goals 7/2
Arsenal v Cardiff Saturday 7th January 13.00
Arsenal 1/7
Draw 5/1
Cardiff 12/1
Get on: Arsenal
The Gunners have failed to find the net in their last two and a half matches. Cardiff conceded five against Reading in their last match, the Gunners will put that stat to bed.
Match Special:
Cardiff to have a player sent off 6/1
Wigan v Leeds Saturday 7th January 13.00
Wigan 4/6
Draw 12/5
Leeds 7/2
Get on: Leeds
Leeds have won their last four, Wigan have lost their last two. Leeds won their only previous FA Cup encounter, a shock is on the cards; if Leeds beating Wigan is a shock.
Match Special:
Leeds to score two or more goals 5/2
Chelsea v Huddersfield Saturday 7th January 15.00
Chelsea 1/14
Draw 6/1
Huddersfield 25/1
Get on: Chelsea
The last time Huddersfield travelled to the Bridge in a Cup match, Chelsea took a 1-0 mauling. It’s seven games without a win for Huddersfield, a repeat can be safely ruled out.
Match Special:
Joe Cole to score at any time 11/8
Ipswich v Portsmouth Saturday 7th January 15.00
Ipswich 7/4
Draw 9/4
Portsmouth 5/4
Get on: Ipswich
Pompey look a stronger outfit under Harry, but five defeats away from home on the bounce tells a story. Joe Royle will have his boys up for this one; home win.
Match Special:
Jason De Vos to score the only goal of the game 175/1
Millwall v Everton Saturday 7th January 15.00
Millwall 5/2
Draw 9/4
Everton 10/11
Get on: Everton
It’s two wins on the bounce for Everton, their improved form should see them past a relegation threatened Millwall.
Match Special:
Tim Cahill to score the only goal of the game 28/1
Newcastle v Mansfield Saturday 7th January 15.00
Newcastle 1/6
Draw 9/2
Mansfield 12/1
Get on: Newcastle
The Geordies have conceded two goals in each of their last three matches. Fortunately for the Toon Army, Mansfield are awful.
Match Special:
Alan Shearer to score a hat-trick 12/1
Norwich v West Ham Saturday 7th January 15.00
Norwich 9/5
Draw 9/4
West Ham 6/5
Get on: Norwich
It’s five wins out of six for Norwich, while the Hammers have lost three on the bounce. The Premiership side are up against it.
Match Special:
Dean Ashton to score two or more goals 8/1
Watford v Bolton Saturday 7th January 15.00
Watford 9/5
Draw 9/4
Bolton 6/5
Get on: Bolton
Watford have a 100% record against Bolton in the FA Cup, played one, won one. One fancies Bolton in this one.
Match Special:
Diouf to score two or more goals 13/2
West Brom v Reading Saturday 7th January 15.00
West Brom 6/5
Draw 11/5
Reading 15/8
Get on: Reading
Reading are unbeaten in the league since the opening day, the Baggies are boinging out of the FA Cup.
Match Special:
Dave Kitson to score the first goal 15/2
Luton v Liverpool Saturday 7th January 17.30 Live on BBC
Luton 13/2
Draw 11/4
Liverpool 2/5
Get on: Liverpool
The Pool are flying, Luton have earned 4 points out of the last 21 available. A banker away win.
Match Special:
Djibril Cisse to score two or more goals 9/2
Burton Albion v Man Utd Sunday 8th January 16.00 Live on Sky
Burton Albion 25/1
Draw 11/2
Man Utd 1/12
Get on: Man Utd
Cloughie and Cup success are synonymous, but this fairytale does not have a happy ending. Burton have been tight at the back recently, they haven’t conceded more than one goal in their last 14 games. It won’t be a cakewalk for United.
Match Special:
Man U to win 2-0 9/1
Leicester v Tottenham Sunday 8th January 18.30 Live on BBC
Leicester 5/1
Draw 12/5
Tottenham 8/15
Get on: Tottenham
These two have drawn each other in the FA Cup on eight previous occasions, Spurs have qualified seven times. It’s eight games without a win for Leicester; it’s a question of how many.
Match Special:
Tottenham to score four or more goals 6/1
Sam Hammam has one wish for the New Year, a Cup upset at Highbury. The charismatic Chairman is one of the games most colourful characters, when he signed Spencer Prior for Cardiff, he inserted two clauses in the contract; Prior had to eat sheep’s testicles and engage in a physical liaison with a sheep. Prior signed the contract, but he flat out refused to eat the testicle.
Mad Sam’s new crazy gang are in for a beating at Highbury, you can back the Cup holders at 1/7.
The managerial career of Graeme Souness hangs by a thread as Michael Owen is ruled out through injury. Michael has fell to the curse of the metatarsal, Wayne Rooney, David Beckham, Steven Gerrard and Gary Neville have all been laid up with a similar injury, that reads like a who’s who of English football; and Gary Neville. All that trouble, from just a little bone. Get on the Geordies to keep Graeme in work for another week; they’re 1/6 to beat Mansfield.
It’s been a tough season for West Brom, they’re odds on to be relegated, their only quality player has handed in a transfer request, their ball-boys have ginger hair and they’ve drawn the hottest team in the Country in the FA Cup. Reading are on a 27 match unbeaten run in the Championship; they’re available at 15/8 to beat the Baggies at the Hawthorns. I have three words of advice; get stuck in.
After a few choice tackles of his own, it’s somewhat ironic that Michael Essien has been ruled out due to a nasty challenge. Maybe there’s something in this karma; there is, half a poppadom. Chelsea are 1/14 to beat Huddersfield; they will win.
Peter Crouch has shown incredible improvement in recent weeks, at the start of the season he looked abysmal, now he’s scoring like Wayne Rooney on an 18-60 holiday in Amsterdam. Steven Gerrard is currently sizzling like a pan full of bacon, you can’t oppose the Reds; a 2/5 banker.
Why is it the characters in Eastenders are always depressed at Christmas? Possibly because they’re West Ham supporters. After losing three matches on the trot, the Hammers won’t fancy a trip to Carrow Road; the form book says the Canaries are a decent investment at 9/5; I refuse to argue with a book.
Kevin Nolan would like to get something off his chest; Stevie Gerrard. He believes Bolton have an excellent chance in the FA Cup this season, I agree. Bolton at 28’s, Villa at 33’s and Reading at 200’s are all worth a small each way tinkle.
With the Lions, Tigers, Owls and Rams all in action, the weekend specials have gone a bit animal.
“A Stag party” – Mansfield to score a goal Evs
“A bald Eagle” – Andy Johnson (Palace) to score with a header 4/1
“A Canary dwarf” – Dean Ashton to score with a header 7/1
“An old Deer” – Wayne Rooney to score a hat-trick 9/1
Quote of the week:
“If I’m at home, yes, I will see it, but maybe my wife would like to go somewhere. It all depends on my wife.”
Jose Mourinho (surprisingly) is mortal.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
The team with the sloppiest finishing in the Premiership is...Aston Villa. Less than 35% of Villa’s attempts trouble the goalkeeper.
Acc of the week:
Aston Villa, Everton, Bolton, Liverpool and Tottenham form the weekend accer, it pays out at 16/1.
Weekend Betting:
Hull v Aston Villa Saturday 7th January 12.30 Live on BBC
Hull 5/2
Draw 9/4
Aston Villa 10/11
Get on: Aston Villa
Villa have drawn Hull in the FA Cup on four previous occasions, the Villa qualified every time. Villa are unbeaten over the Xmas period, away win.
Match Special:
Villa to score three or more goals 7/2
Arsenal v Cardiff Saturday 7th January 13.00
Arsenal 1/7
Draw 5/1
Cardiff 12/1
Get on: Arsenal
The Gunners have failed to find the net in their last two and a half matches. Cardiff conceded five against Reading in their last match, the Gunners will put that stat to bed.
Match Special:
Cardiff to have a player sent off 6/1
Wigan v Leeds Saturday 7th January 13.00
Wigan 4/6
Draw 12/5
Leeds 7/2
Get on: Leeds
Leeds have won their last four, Wigan have lost their last two. Leeds won their only previous FA Cup encounter, a shock is on the cards; if Leeds beating Wigan is a shock.
Match Special:
Leeds to score two or more goals 5/2
Chelsea v Huddersfield Saturday 7th January 15.00
Chelsea 1/14
Draw 6/1
Huddersfield 25/1
Get on: Chelsea
The last time Huddersfield travelled to the Bridge in a Cup match, Chelsea took a 1-0 mauling. It’s seven games without a win for Huddersfield, a repeat can be safely ruled out.
Match Special:
Joe Cole to score at any time 11/8
Ipswich v Portsmouth Saturday 7th January 15.00
Ipswich 7/4
Draw 9/4
Portsmouth 5/4
Get on: Ipswich
Pompey look a stronger outfit under Harry, but five defeats away from home on the bounce tells a story. Joe Royle will have his boys up for this one; home win.
Match Special:
Jason De Vos to score the only goal of the game 175/1
Millwall v Everton Saturday 7th January 15.00
Millwall 5/2
Draw 9/4
Everton 10/11
Get on: Everton
It’s two wins on the bounce for Everton, their improved form should see them past a relegation threatened Millwall.
Match Special:
Tim Cahill to score the only goal of the game 28/1
Newcastle v Mansfield Saturday 7th January 15.00
Newcastle 1/6
Draw 9/2
Mansfield 12/1
Get on: Newcastle
The Geordies have conceded two goals in each of their last three matches. Fortunately for the Toon Army, Mansfield are awful.
Match Special:
Alan Shearer to score a hat-trick 12/1
Norwich v West Ham Saturday 7th January 15.00
Norwich 9/5
Draw 9/4
West Ham 6/5
Get on: Norwich
It’s five wins out of six for Norwich, while the Hammers have lost three on the bounce. The Premiership side are up against it.
Match Special:
Dean Ashton to score two or more goals 8/1
Watford v Bolton Saturday 7th January 15.00
Watford 9/5
Draw 9/4
Bolton 6/5
Get on: Bolton
Watford have a 100% record against Bolton in the FA Cup, played one, won one. One fancies Bolton in this one.
Match Special:
Diouf to score two or more goals 13/2
West Brom v Reading Saturday 7th January 15.00
West Brom 6/5
Draw 11/5
Reading 15/8
Get on: Reading
Reading are unbeaten in the league since the opening day, the Baggies are boinging out of the FA Cup.
Match Special:
Dave Kitson to score the first goal 15/2
Luton v Liverpool Saturday 7th January 17.30 Live on BBC
Luton 13/2
Draw 11/4
Liverpool 2/5
Get on: Liverpool
The Pool are flying, Luton have earned 4 points out of the last 21 available. A banker away win.
Match Special:
Djibril Cisse to score two or more goals 9/2
Burton Albion v Man Utd Sunday 8th January 16.00 Live on Sky
Burton Albion 25/1
Draw 11/2
Man Utd 1/12
Get on: Man Utd
Cloughie and Cup success are synonymous, but this fairytale does not have a happy ending. Burton have been tight at the back recently, they haven’t conceded more than one goal in their last 14 games. It won’t be a cakewalk for United.
Match Special:
Man U to win 2-0 9/1
Leicester v Tottenham Sunday 8th January 18.30 Live on BBC
Leicester 5/1
Draw 12/5
Tottenham 8/15
Get on: Tottenham
These two have drawn each other in the FA Cup on eight previous occasions, Spurs have qualified seven times. It’s eight games without a win for Leicester; it’s a question of how many.
Match Special:
Tottenham to score four or more goals 6/1
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
The Gazza Strip
The Gazza Strip
Contrary to popular belief, it’s not all parties and yachts when you’re a Premiership footballer. At this time of year, most players will face up to four matches in seven days, a schedule so tough, Wayne Rooney will be up and down the motorway living off cold turkey sandwiches. He refuses to moan though, he enjoys an old bird. Man U are unbeaten in nine matches in the league, they’re a must bet at 4/11 at home to Bolton.
Cristiano Ronaldo is worth a little bet to open the scoring. The Portuguese wonder-boy has had a disappointing season; he’s been on a bench more often than Paul Gascoigne. The undisputed King of the unnecessary step-over is back in the starting 11; a return to form is imminent. He’s 9/1 to score the first goal and 5/2 to score at any time.
After going 93 matches for Man U without scoring, Rio Ferdinand has now bagged two in five games, a record that James Beattie can only dream about. Rio’s a 10/1 shot to make that record three in six, stranger things have happened.
It’s not just turkeys that get stuffed over Christmas. David Moyes is in the middle of the most embarrassing run since Paula Radcliffe relieved herself during the London marathon. Everton face a Sunderland team who have just had their best result of the season; their midweek match was called off. Get on the Mackems at 13/8.
Peter Crouch shoved Lee Bowyer to the ground on Boxing Day, an act that would normally receive a red card and a three match ban. The lanky striker can consider himself fortunate to be available for selection against West Brom; he’s not very good at football. Stevie Gerrard is back to his sublime best for the Pool, he’s a 13/8 shot to find the back of the net against Albion. Liverpool are good things at 1/4.
Steve Bruce didn’t endear himself to the Birmingham supporters when he waved to Manchester United fans as the Blues lost heavily in the Cup. If Bruce’s familiarity with opposition supporters is in relation to how badly they get beat, he might end up crowd surfing with the Chelsea fans. Chelsea are a 1/6 certainty.
It’s been widely reported that Graeme Souness wants Alan Shearer to stay on for another season, he probably will; as manager. Souness may have settled the dressing-room squabbling, but he can’t find a cure for their away day blues. The Geordies travel to White Hart Lane; Spurs get the nod at 4/6.
Milan Baros proved to be tasty with his hands against Everton, the Villa could do with a 2nd keeper when the Arsenal come to town. The Gunners are 4/6; they’re home, and almost certainly, hosed.
The weekend specials:
“Cold Turkey” – Emre to be booked 5/2
“Stuffed” – Thierry Henry to score a hat-trick 16/1
“Take the tree down” – Peter Crouch to be booked 3/1
“Hog many” – Wayne Rooney to score a hat-trick 14/1
Quote of the week:
“I’m not sure it was a straight red, maybe a yellow would have been more sensible.”
Steven Gerrard, the day after he ran across the pitch to confront Alan Shearer and Lee Bowyer, pressurising the referee into showing Bowyer a straight red.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Only Van Nistelrooy and Rooney have scored more league goals for Man Utd than Rio Ferdinand this season.
Acc of the week:
Arsenal, West Ham, Tottenham, Man Utd and Man City make up the weekend accer, it pays out at a tasty 27/1.
Weekend Betting:
Aston Villa v Arsenal Saturday 31st December 12.45 Live on Sky
Aston Villa 7/2
Draw 12/5
Arsenal 4/6
Get on: Arsenal
Arsenal have won their last four matches against the Villa by two clear goals with Thierry Henry scoring in every match. Say no more.
Match Special:
Arsenal to win by two or more goals 13/8
Charlton v West Ham Saturday 31st December 13.00
Charlton 5/4
Draw 9/4
West Ham 7/4
Get on: West Ham
Charlton have lost eight out of their last nine matches, it has to be the Hammers.
Match Special:
Marlon Harewood to score two or more goals 8/1
Chelsea v Birmingham Saturday 31st December 13.00
Chelsea 1/6
Draw 9/2
Birmingham 12/1
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea have a 100% record at home in the league, Birmingham are the 2nd worst team in the Premiership. Tough call.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 3-0 13/2
Tottenham v Newcastle Saturday 31st December 13.00
Tottenham 4/6
Draw 12/5
Newcastle 7/2
Get on: Tottenham
Spurs haven’t tasted defeat at the Lane since August; the Toon Army have lost four of their last five matches away from home. Home win.
Match Special:
Tottenham to keep a clean sheet 6/5
Liverpool v West Brom Saturday 31st December 15.00
Liverpool 1/4
Draw 7/2
West Brom 10/1
Get on: Liverpool
The Pool have met Albion four times in the Premiership, the aggregate score? 16-0. Liverpool are aiming for their 10th straight league win, they’re gonna get it.
Match Special:
Liverpool to win 2-0 11/2
Man Utd v Bolton Saturday 31st December 15.00
Man Utd 4/11
Draw 3/1
Bolton 13/2
Get on: Man Utd
It’s seven wins and two draws from their last nine league matches for Man U, Bolton have failed to score in their last two matches away from home. Definite home win.
Match Special:
Van Nistelrooy and Rooney both to score 4/1
Middlesbrough v Man City Saturday 31st December 15.00
Middlesbrough 5/4
Draw 9/4
Man City 7/4
Get on: Man City
Only Sunderland have conceded more goals in front of their own fans than the Boro, only Man U and Chelsea have scored more goals away from home than Man City. Stuart Pearce gave the City players Christmas day off, proving he’s more of a pussycat than a psycho. Away win.
Match Special:
Andy Cole to score two or more goals 8/1
Portsmouth v Fulham Saturday 31st December 15.00
Portsmouth 6/5
Draw 11/5
Fulham 15/8
Get on: Draw
Pompey were absolutely murdered at Highbury in midweek. Fulham haven’t won away from home all season, it’s a draw.
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Sunderland v Everton Saturday 31st December 15.00
Sunderland 13/8
Draw 11/5
Everton 11/8
Get on: Sunderland
Sunderland have won four of their five previous Premiership matches at home to Everton. The Moyes Boys have conceded 11 goals in three matches; the Mackems will never have a better chance.
Match Special:
Sunderland to win 1-0 7/1
Wigan v Blackburn Saturday 31st December 15.00
Wigan 6/5
Draw 11/5
Blackburn 15/8
Get on: Draw
Wigan have won their last four at home; Blackburn have won three of their last four on the road. Score draw.
Match Special:
Match to finish 2-2 14/1
Contrary to popular belief, it’s not all parties and yachts when you’re a Premiership footballer. At this time of year, most players will face up to four matches in seven days, a schedule so tough, Wayne Rooney will be up and down the motorway living off cold turkey sandwiches. He refuses to moan though, he enjoys an old bird. Man U are unbeaten in nine matches in the league, they’re a must bet at 4/11 at home to Bolton.
Cristiano Ronaldo is worth a little bet to open the scoring. The Portuguese wonder-boy has had a disappointing season; he’s been on a bench more often than Paul Gascoigne. The undisputed King of the unnecessary step-over is back in the starting 11; a return to form is imminent. He’s 9/1 to score the first goal and 5/2 to score at any time.
After going 93 matches for Man U without scoring, Rio Ferdinand has now bagged two in five games, a record that James Beattie can only dream about. Rio’s a 10/1 shot to make that record three in six, stranger things have happened.
It’s not just turkeys that get stuffed over Christmas. David Moyes is in the middle of the most embarrassing run since Paula Radcliffe relieved herself during the London marathon. Everton face a Sunderland team who have just had their best result of the season; their midweek match was called off. Get on the Mackems at 13/8.
Peter Crouch shoved Lee Bowyer to the ground on Boxing Day, an act that would normally receive a red card and a three match ban. The lanky striker can consider himself fortunate to be available for selection against West Brom; he’s not very good at football. Stevie Gerrard is back to his sublime best for the Pool, he’s a 13/8 shot to find the back of the net against Albion. Liverpool are good things at 1/4.
Steve Bruce didn’t endear himself to the Birmingham supporters when he waved to Manchester United fans as the Blues lost heavily in the Cup. If Bruce’s familiarity with opposition supporters is in relation to how badly they get beat, he might end up crowd surfing with the Chelsea fans. Chelsea are a 1/6 certainty.
It’s been widely reported that Graeme Souness wants Alan Shearer to stay on for another season, he probably will; as manager. Souness may have settled the dressing-room squabbling, but he can’t find a cure for their away day blues. The Geordies travel to White Hart Lane; Spurs get the nod at 4/6.
Milan Baros proved to be tasty with his hands against Everton, the Villa could do with a 2nd keeper when the Arsenal come to town. The Gunners are 4/6; they’re home, and almost certainly, hosed.
The weekend specials:
“Cold Turkey” – Emre to be booked 5/2
“Stuffed” – Thierry Henry to score a hat-trick 16/1
“Take the tree down” – Peter Crouch to be booked 3/1
“Hog many” – Wayne Rooney to score a hat-trick 14/1
Quote of the week:
“I’m not sure it was a straight red, maybe a yellow would have been more sensible.”
Steven Gerrard, the day after he ran across the pitch to confront Alan Shearer and Lee Bowyer, pressurising the referee into showing Bowyer a straight red.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Only Van Nistelrooy and Rooney have scored more league goals for Man Utd than Rio Ferdinand this season.
Acc of the week:
Arsenal, West Ham, Tottenham, Man Utd and Man City make up the weekend accer, it pays out at a tasty 27/1.
Weekend Betting:
Aston Villa v Arsenal Saturday 31st December 12.45 Live on Sky
Aston Villa 7/2
Draw 12/5
Arsenal 4/6
Get on: Arsenal
Arsenal have won their last four matches against the Villa by two clear goals with Thierry Henry scoring in every match. Say no more.
Match Special:
Arsenal to win by two or more goals 13/8
Charlton v West Ham Saturday 31st December 13.00
Charlton 5/4
Draw 9/4
West Ham 7/4
Get on: West Ham
Charlton have lost eight out of their last nine matches, it has to be the Hammers.
Match Special:
Marlon Harewood to score two or more goals 8/1
Chelsea v Birmingham Saturday 31st December 13.00
Chelsea 1/6
Draw 9/2
Birmingham 12/1
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea have a 100% record at home in the league, Birmingham are the 2nd worst team in the Premiership. Tough call.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 3-0 13/2
Tottenham v Newcastle Saturday 31st December 13.00
Tottenham 4/6
Draw 12/5
Newcastle 7/2
Get on: Tottenham
Spurs haven’t tasted defeat at the Lane since August; the Toon Army have lost four of their last five matches away from home. Home win.
Match Special:
Tottenham to keep a clean sheet 6/5
Liverpool v West Brom Saturday 31st December 15.00
Liverpool 1/4
Draw 7/2
West Brom 10/1
Get on: Liverpool
The Pool have met Albion four times in the Premiership, the aggregate score? 16-0. Liverpool are aiming for their 10th straight league win, they’re gonna get it.
Match Special:
Liverpool to win 2-0 11/2
Man Utd v Bolton Saturday 31st December 15.00
Man Utd 4/11
Draw 3/1
Bolton 13/2
Get on: Man Utd
It’s seven wins and two draws from their last nine league matches for Man U, Bolton have failed to score in their last two matches away from home. Definite home win.
Match Special:
Van Nistelrooy and Rooney both to score 4/1
Middlesbrough v Man City Saturday 31st December 15.00
Middlesbrough 5/4
Draw 9/4
Man City 7/4
Get on: Man City
Only Sunderland have conceded more goals in front of their own fans than the Boro, only Man U and Chelsea have scored more goals away from home than Man City. Stuart Pearce gave the City players Christmas day off, proving he’s more of a pussycat than a psycho. Away win.
Match Special:
Andy Cole to score two or more goals 8/1
Portsmouth v Fulham Saturday 31st December 15.00
Portsmouth 6/5
Draw 11/5
Fulham 15/8
Get on: Draw
Pompey were absolutely murdered at Highbury in midweek. Fulham haven’t won away from home all season, it’s a draw.
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Sunderland v Everton Saturday 31st December 15.00
Sunderland 13/8
Draw 11/5
Everton 11/8
Get on: Sunderland
Sunderland have won four of their five previous Premiership matches at home to Everton. The Moyes Boys have conceded 11 goals in three matches; the Mackems will never have a better chance.
Match Special:
Sunderland to win 1-0 7/1
Wigan v Blackburn Saturday 31st December 15.00
Wigan 6/5
Draw 11/5
Blackburn 15/8
Get on: Draw
Wigan have won their last four at home; Blackburn have won three of their last four on the road. Score draw.
Match Special:
Match to finish 2-2 14/1
Thursday, December 1, 2005
A Tutu Thriller
I’m no stranger to pain; I once watched all of Soccer AM. The feeling of hopelessness I experienced that day is similar to the distress that Manchester United supporters now feel, as they face a future without Roy Keane.
Sir Alex believes that Alan Smith may be a long term replacement for the influential head-case, but Smithy is not a midfielder; he’s like the wife on our first date, a little forward.
Even with Smithy and Fletcher in the team, United are good things at home to Portsmouth. Unfortunately, the 1/5 on offer won’t make you rich, unless you’re Roman Abramovic or Rio Ferdinand.
Rio has admitted taking ballet lessons when he was younger; my wife was shocked by the irony of it all, as she used to be a quality centre back. Rio can be backed at 10/1 to break his goal scoring duck against Pompey, but beware; as an experienced ballet dancer, his celebration may involve two pirouettes and a leap. Not that I know what a pirouette is.
Paul Scholes is also overdue a goal, he hasn’t found the net in 19 games this season, a somewhat disappointing return for a goal scoring midfielder. The ginger lad is far more likely to find the back of the net, 9/4 is on the table.
Nobby Solano was Aston Villa’s most impressive player last season, but quickly left the Midlands to rejoin the Toon Army. The advert may say ‘Nobby’s nuts’, but leaving Villa looks to be a sensible decision. Nobby wisely re-signed, something O’Leary is probably considering.
The last time Villa travelled to St James’ Park, Kieron Dyer and Lee Bowyer had their hand-bags out and both received a red card as a result. The way Villa are playing on the road, they’ll need at least three Geordies to be sent off to have a chance of a draw. Newcastle are the nap of the week, let’s play at 4/5.
Everton were 1-0 winners on nine occasions last season, and have chalked up another four this term. James Beattie will probably start the match against Blackburn, so two or more Everton goals can be safely ruled out. Another 1-0 win is on the cards for the blue half of Liverpool; take a piece of the 8’s.
It wasn’t so long ago that David Moyes was courting Robbie Savage, that blonde hair can be confusing after a few beers. Robbie was a naughty boy last week; when the little finger of Jose Reyes flicked his nose, his reaction was to hold his face in his hands as if he’d just been outbid for a new caravan on EBay. Savage somehow avoided a booking for his shameful play-acting, he’s a 5/4 shot to see yellow against Everton.
The weekend specials are in honour of the wife; they’re related to headers.
“Big Brother” – Rio Ferdinand to score with a header 33/1
“Stretch Mark” – Viduka to score with a header 10/1
“The Beat Route” – James Beattie to score with a header 7/1
“Nob Head” – Solano to score with a header 12/1
“Bad Roon Rising” – Wayne Rooney to score with a header 4/1
Quote of the week:
“For the last 20 minutes, it was an embarrassment and a gutless performance.”
Mick McCarthy tells it like it is.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Fulham have scored the first goal of the game in 9 of their 14 matches, only Chelsea have a better record.
Acc of the week:
Liverpool, Everton, Chelsea , Newcastle and Tottenham.
The 5 fold pays out at over 14/1.
Weekend Betting:
Liverpool v Wigan Saturday 3rd December 12.45 Live on Sky
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 5/2
Wigan 5/1
Get on: Liverpool
Liverpool have kept 7 clean sheets in a row; Wigan have the best defensive record on the road, it’s a narrow home win.
Match Special:
Liverpool to win 1-0 6/1
Blackburn v Everton Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Blackburn 10/11
Draw 11/5
Everton 13/5
Get on: Everton
Everton have won three of their last four, all by a goal to nil. The worm has turned.
Match Special:
Cahill to score the only goal of the game 55/1
Bolton v Arsenal Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Bolton 11/4
Draw 9/4
Arsenal 5/6
Get on: Draw
Bolton have only conceded one goal at home in the league all season, the lowest in the Premiership. Arsenal have won the same amount of games away from home as Sunderland; score draw.
Match Special:
Match to finish 2-2 14/1
Chelsea v Middlesbrough Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Chelsea 2/9
Draw 4/1
Middlesbrough 9/1
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea won both matches against ‘Boro ‘to nil’ last season, Didier Drogba scored every goal. Will Mourinho let the Drog off his leash? As Crespo has scored in Chelsea’s last three matches, probably not.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 3-0 13/2
Newcastle v Aston Villa Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Newcastle 4/5
Draw 9/4
Aston Villa 3/1
Get on: Newcastle
Man U are the only team to win at St James’ Park this season, file this one under ‘home banker’.
Match Special:
Newcastle to keep a clean sheet 11/10
Tottenham v Sunderland Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Tottenham 3/10
Draw 10/3
Sunderland 8/1
Get on: Tottenham
Sunderland have traveled to White Hart Lane in the Premiership five times, they’ve lost all five. Chelsea are the only team to have won at the Lane, Sunderland aren’t Chelsea.
Match Special:
Tottenham to win 2-0 11/2
West Brom v Fulham Saturday 3rd December 15.00
West Brom 5/4
Draw 9/4
Fulham 7/4
Get on: Draw
The Baggies have turned on the style recently, scoring six goals in their last two league matches. Fulham’s wait for an away win looks set to continue.
Match Special:
Malbranque to score the last goal 11/1
Man Utd v Portsmouth Saturday 3rd December 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Man Utd 1/5
Draw 4/1
Portsmouth 11/1
Get on: Man Utd
It’s three defeats in a row for Pompey with no goals scored, it’s not the best time to be heading to Old Trafford. Rooney has ran the show in the last few matches, if he adds goals to his sparkling performances, he’ll be handy.
Match Special:
Wayne Rooney to score two or more goals 4/1
Charlton v Man City Sunday 4th December 16.00 Live on Sky
Charlton 11/8
Draw 11/5
Man City 13/8
Get on: Charlton
When Charlton host Man City in the Premiership, there are always goals. With both teams out of form, the value lies with the home team at 11/8.
Match Special:
Charlton to win 2-1 8/1
Birmingham v West Ham Monday 5th December 20.00 Live on Sky
Birmingham 5/4
Draw 9/4
West Ham 7/4
Get on: West Ham
Three of the last four league matches at St Andrew’s have been won 1-0 by the away team. A pleasing stat.
Match Special:
West Ham to win 1-0 7/1
Sir Alex believes that Alan Smith may be a long term replacement for the influential head-case, but Smithy is not a midfielder; he’s like the wife on our first date, a little forward.
Even with Smithy and Fletcher in the team, United are good things at home to Portsmouth. Unfortunately, the 1/5 on offer won’t make you rich, unless you’re Roman Abramovic or Rio Ferdinand.
Rio has admitted taking ballet lessons when he was younger; my wife was shocked by the irony of it all, as she used to be a quality centre back. Rio can be backed at 10/1 to break his goal scoring duck against Pompey, but beware; as an experienced ballet dancer, his celebration may involve two pirouettes and a leap. Not that I know what a pirouette is.
Paul Scholes is also overdue a goal, he hasn’t found the net in 19 games this season, a somewhat disappointing return for a goal scoring midfielder. The ginger lad is far more likely to find the back of the net, 9/4 is on the table.
Nobby Solano was Aston Villa’s most impressive player last season, but quickly left the Midlands to rejoin the Toon Army. The advert may say ‘Nobby’s nuts’, but leaving Villa looks to be a sensible decision. Nobby wisely re-signed, something O’Leary is probably considering.
The last time Villa travelled to St James’ Park, Kieron Dyer and Lee Bowyer had their hand-bags out and both received a red card as a result. The way Villa are playing on the road, they’ll need at least three Geordies to be sent off to have a chance of a draw. Newcastle are the nap of the week, let’s play at 4/5.
Everton were 1-0 winners on nine occasions last season, and have chalked up another four this term. James Beattie will probably start the match against Blackburn, so two or more Everton goals can be safely ruled out. Another 1-0 win is on the cards for the blue half of Liverpool; take a piece of the 8’s.
It wasn’t so long ago that David Moyes was courting Robbie Savage, that blonde hair can be confusing after a few beers. Robbie was a naughty boy last week; when the little finger of Jose Reyes flicked his nose, his reaction was to hold his face in his hands as if he’d just been outbid for a new caravan on EBay. Savage somehow avoided a booking for his shameful play-acting, he’s a 5/4 shot to see yellow against Everton.
The weekend specials are in honour of the wife; they’re related to headers.
“Big Brother” – Rio Ferdinand to score with a header 33/1
“Stretch Mark” – Viduka to score with a header 10/1
“The Beat Route” – James Beattie to score with a header 7/1
“Nob Head” – Solano to score with a header 12/1
“Bad Roon Rising” – Wayne Rooney to score with a header 4/1
Quote of the week:
“For the last 20 minutes, it was an embarrassment and a gutless performance.”
Mick McCarthy tells it like it is.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Fulham have scored the first goal of the game in 9 of their 14 matches, only Chelsea have a better record.
Acc of the week:
Liverpool, Everton, Chelsea , Newcastle and Tottenham.
The 5 fold pays out at over 14/1.
Weekend Betting:
Liverpool v Wigan Saturday 3rd December 12.45 Live on Sky
Liverpool 1/2
Draw 5/2
Wigan 5/1
Get on: Liverpool
Liverpool have kept 7 clean sheets in a row; Wigan have the best defensive record on the road, it’s a narrow home win.
Match Special:
Liverpool to win 1-0 6/1
Blackburn v Everton Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Blackburn 10/11
Draw 11/5
Everton 13/5
Get on: Everton
Everton have won three of their last four, all by a goal to nil. The worm has turned.
Match Special:
Cahill to score the only goal of the game 55/1
Bolton v Arsenal Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Bolton 11/4
Draw 9/4
Arsenal 5/6
Get on: Draw
Bolton have only conceded one goal at home in the league all season, the lowest in the Premiership. Arsenal have won the same amount of games away from home as Sunderland; score draw.
Match Special:
Match to finish 2-2 14/1
Chelsea v Middlesbrough Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Chelsea 2/9
Draw 4/1
Middlesbrough 9/1
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea won both matches against ‘Boro ‘to nil’ last season, Didier Drogba scored every goal. Will Mourinho let the Drog off his leash? As Crespo has scored in Chelsea’s last three matches, probably not.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 3-0 13/2
Newcastle v Aston Villa Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Newcastle 4/5
Draw 9/4
Aston Villa 3/1
Get on: Newcastle
Man U are the only team to win at St James’ Park this season, file this one under ‘home banker’.
Match Special:
Newcastle to keep a clean sheet 11/10
Tottenham v Sunderland Saturday 3rd December 15.00
Tottenham 3/10
Draw 10/3
Sunderland 8/1
Get on: Tottenham
Sunderland have traveled to White Hart Lane in the Premiership five times, they’ve lost all five. Chelsea are the only team to have won at the Lane, Sunderland aren’t Chelsea.
Match Special:
Tottenham to win 2-0 11/2
West Brom v Fulham Saturday 3rd December 15.00
West Brom 5/4
Draw 9/4
Fulham 7/4
Get on: Draw
The Baggies have turned on the style recently, scoring six goals in their last two league matches. Fulham’s wait for an away win looks set to continue.
Match Special:
Malbranque to score the last goal 11/1
Man Utd v Portsmouth Saturday 3rd December 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Man Utd 1/5
Draw 4/1
Portsmouth 11/1
Get on: Man Utd
It’s three defeats in a row for Pompey with no goals scored, it’s not the best time to be heading to Old Trafford. Rooney has ran the show in the last few matches, if he adds goals to his sparkling performances, he’ll be handy.
Match Special:
Wayne Rooney to score two or more goals 4/1
Charlton v Man City Sunday 4th December 16.00 Live on Sky
Charlton 11/8
Draw 11/5
Man City 13/8
Get on: Charlton
When Charlton host Man City in the Premiership, there are always goals. With both teams out of form, the value lies with the home team at 11/8.
Match Special:
Charlton to win 2-1 8/1
Birmingham v West Ham Monday 5th December 20.00 Live on Sky
Birmingham 5/4
Draw 9/4
West Ham 7/4
Get on: West Ham
Three of the last four league matches at St Andrew’s have been won 1-0 by the away team. A pleasing stat.
Match Special:
West Ham to win 1-0 7/1
Thursday, November 24, 2005
Science is Goalden.
The definition of happiness is spending time with the one you love; for me, that’s the television. Having accidentally flicked on to a science channel, I was intrigued by the following question, “What came first, the chicken or the egg?”
Armed with just Wayne Rooney, an egg, a 20 year old brunette from Manchester and a nightclub kitchen, I conducted an experiment that could easily land me a Nobel Prize.
Given only six minutes and 22 seconds in the controlled environment, Rooney completely ignored the opportunity to enjoy a nice boiled egg; instead, the game bird received his full attention.
Is Wayne Rooney a metaphor for life itself? I’ll let you be the judge. Are Man Utd a good bet to beat West Ham at 8/13? Undoubtedly. Sir Alex has neutered, sorry nurtured young Rooney along wonderfully; the big lad is available at 20/1 to score another three times.
Rio Ferdinand will play against his brother in a competitive match for the first time, there’s a 62% chance of Rio ending up with the bragging-rights; that’s almost two Ferds.
Alan Pardew suggested that Anton Ferdinand should change his hairstyle to differentiate himself from his brother. I’d like to suggest the Kevin Keegan style from the 70’s, as my Grandma used to say after senility kicked in, ‘The surly Ferd matches the perm’. You can back either brother to score at 11/2, both brothers finding the net is a 150/1 shot.
Arsenal meet Blackburn for the first time since last seasons FA Cup semi-final, where Robin Van Persie and Andy Todd’s elbow were so close, they’re now exchanging Christmas presents. Blackburn attempted to kick Arsenal off the pitch that day, another tasty encounter could be on the cards. You can back a player to be sent off at 3/1.
Thierry Henry is in a rich vein of form at Highbury, the majestic Frenchman has netted 15 goals in his last 10 games. He’s 12/1 to net a hat-trick against Blackburn, and that’s not the worst punt in the World; Portsmouth to beat Chelsea is.
Chelsea’s mini blip was over before it really began; Pompey haven’t won at home this season and Chelsea have never lost a league match outside Manchester under Mourinho. Chelsea are a great bet to hack up, it’s as easy as 1/3.
You can question the goal scoring ability of Liverpool’s Peter Crouch, but he’s undeniably a true gentleman. Even football commentators address him as Mr. Crouch; although they often use his pseudonyms, Mr. Penalty and Mr. Nother-Sitter. Liverpool have won their last three league matches, scoring 10 goals without reply. The ‘Pool are 6/4 to beat Man City; meet the weekend nap.
The West Ham v Man U match provides the inspiration for the weekend specials.
“Over Keane” – Alan Smith and Darren Fletcher both to score 20/1
“Beni, ill” – Yossi Benayoun to be booked 3/1
“Hammer House of Horror” – Rooney and Van Nistelrooy both to score 9/2
“Woody Alan” – Marlon Harewood and Alan Smith both to score 12/1
“Paul a fast one” – Scholes to score in the first half 9/1
“A vintage Sheri” – Teddy Sheringham to score two or more goals 12/1
Quote of the week:
“Pressure? Pressure is being a parent and having no money to feed your children. There is no pressure in football.”
Jose Mourinho should save that one for Alex McLeish and Alain Perrin.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
West Ham have only scored a 1st half goal in one game this season.
Stat’s not so surprising
The team who have committed the most fouls in the Premiership is…….Blackburn.
Acc of the week:
Aston Villa
Liverpool
Chelsea
Middlesbrough
Man Utd
The five-fold will pay over 20/1 when successful.
Weekend Betting:
Arsenal v Blackburn Saturday 26th November 15.00
Arsenal 1/4
Draw 7/2
Blackburn 10/1
Get on: Arsenal
Arsenal have won every match they’ve played at Highbury this season and they’ve won their last five matches against Blackburn without conceding a goal. ‘Nailed on’ springs to mind.
Match Special:
Blackburn to have a player sent off 6/1
Aston Villa v Charlton Saturday 26th November 15.00
Aston Villa 11/8
Draw 11/5
Charlton 13/8
Get on: Aston Villa
Villa’s win at the Stadium of Light could well kick-start their season, Phillips and Baros are warm; home win.
Match Special:
Phillips and Baros both to score 7/1
Man City v Liverpool Saturday 26th November 15.00
Man City 6/4
Draw 11/5
Liverpool 6/4
Get on: Liverpool
Liverpool head to Manchester full of confidence, they’ve finally found their scoring touch and they’re incredibly tight at the back. 6/4? Yes please.
Match Special:
Cisse to score the only goal of the game 33/1
Sunderland v Birmingham Saturday 26th November 15.00
Sunderland 6/4
Draw 11/5
Birmingham 6/4
Get on: Birmingham
The Mackems have conceded three or more goals in their last six matches; with a defence that leaky, even the goal-shy Blues should take advantage. Sunderland have never scored against Birmingham in the Premiership; away win.
Match Special:
Emile Heskey to score at any time 11/8
Wigan v Tottenham Saturday 26th November 15.00
Wigan 7/4
Draw 9/4
Tottenham 5/4
Get on: Wigan
Wigan should score, only Chelsea have kept a clean sheet against the Latics this season. Defoe was dropped like a hot potato last week, Spurs may draw a blank.
Match Special:
Wigan to win 1-0 7/1
Portsmouth v Chelsea Saturday 26th November 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Portsmouth 13/2
Draw 10/3
Chelsea 1/3
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea have thrashed Pompey recently, winning by two or more goals in their last four meetings. Portsmouth need a miracle.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 2-0 11/2
Everton v Newcastle Sunday 27th November 13.30 Live on Sky
Everton 6/4
Draw 11/5
Newcastle 6/4
Get on: Draw
This one should be tight. Everton have scored against Newcastle in their last 11 meetings; with Owen and Shearer back, the Geordies should also find the back of the net. 11 of Everton’s last 12 league matches have produced 2 goals or less. 1-1 it is then.
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Fulham v Bolton Sunday 27th November 14.00
Fulham 6/4
Draw 11/5
Bolton 6/4
Get on: Fulham
Every tine Bolton have travelled to the Cottage in the Premiership, they’ve took a beating. Malbranque and Diop are looking sharp; home win.
Match Special:
Malbranque to score at any time 11/4
Middlesbrough v West Brom Sunday 27th November 15.00
Middlesbrough 8/11
Draw 9/4
West Brom 10/3
Get on: Middlesbrough
West Brom have only scored one league goal away from home this season. Historically, they’ve not won in Middlesbrough since 1952 and they’ve conceded 16 goals on their last six trips. A shoeing awaits.
Match Special:
Middlesbrough to win by two or more goals 7/4
West Ham v Man Utd Sunday 27th November 16.00 Live on Sky
West Ham 4/1
Draw 12/5
Man Utd 8/13
Get on: Man Utd
Man U have scored goals for fun against West Ham in recent seasons, 35 goals in 11 games. United are the top goal scorers away from home in the Premiership; away win.
Match Special:
Rooney to score two or more goals 9/2
Armed with just Wayne Rooney, an egg, a 20 year old brunette from Manchester and a nightclub kitchen, I conducted an experiment that could easily land me a Nobel Prize.
Given only six minutes and 22 seconds in the controlled environment, Rooney completely ignored the opportunity to enjoy a nice boiled egg; instead, the game bird received his full attention.
Is Wayne Rooney a metaphor for life itself? I’ll let you be the judge. Are Man Utd a good bet to beat West Ham at 8/13? Undoubtedly. Sir Alex has neutered, sorry nurtured young Rooney along wonderfully; the big lad is available at 20/1 to score another three times.
Rio Ferdinand will play against his brother in a competitive match for the first time, there’s a 62% chance of Rio ending up with the bragging-rights; that’s almost two Ferds.
Alan Pardew suggested that Anton Ferdinand should change his hairstyle to differentiate himself from his brother. I’d like to suggest the Kevin Keegan style from the 70’s, as my Grandma used to say after senility kicked in, ‘The surly Ferd matches the perm’. You can back either brother to score at 11/2, both brothers finding the net is a 150/1 shot.
Arsenal meet Blackburn for the first time since last seasons FA Cup semi-final, where Robin Van Persie and Andy Todd’s elbow were so close, they’re now exchanging Christmas presents. Blackburn attempted to kick Arsenal off the pitch that day, another tasty encounter could be on the cards. You can back a player to be sent off at 3/1.
Thierry Henry is in a rich vein of form at Highbury, the majestic Frenchman has netted 15 goals in his last 10 games. He’s 12/1 to net a hat-trick against Blackburn, and that’s not the worst punt in the World; Portsmouth to beat Chelsea is.
Chelsea’s mini blip was over before it really began; Pompey haven’t won at home this season and Chelsea have never lost a league match outside Manchester under Mourinho. Chelsea are a great bet to hack up, it’s as easy as 1/3.
You can question the goal scoring ability of Liverpool’s Peter Crouch, but he’s undeniably a true gentleman. Even football commentators address him as Mr. Crouch; although they often use his pseudonyms, Mr. Penalty and Mr. Nother-Sitter. Liverpool have won their last three league matches, scoring 10 goals without reply. The ‘Pool are 6/4 to beat Man City; meet the weekend nap.
The West Ham v Man U match provides the inspiration for the weekend specials.
“Over Keane” – Alan Smith and Darren Fletcher both to score 20/1
“Beni, ill” – Yossi Benayoun to be booked 3/1
“Hammer House of Horror” – Rooney and Van Nistelrooy both to score 9/2
“Woody Alan” – Marlon Harewood and Alan Smith both to score 12/1
“Paul a fast one” – Scholes to score in the first half 9/1
“A vintage Sheri” – Teddy Sheringham to score two or more goals 12/1
Quote of the week:
“Pressure? Pressure is being a parent and having no money to feed your children. There is no pressure in football.”
Jose Mourinho should save that one for Alex McLeish and Alain Perrin.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
West Ham have only scored a 1st half goal in one game this season.
Stat’s not so surprising
The team who have committed the most fouls in the Premiership is…….Blackburn.
Acc of the week:
Aston Villa
Liverpool
Chelsea
Middlesbrough
Man Utd
The five-fold will pay over 20/1 when successful.
Weekend Betting:
Arsenal v Blackburn Saturday 26th November 15.00
Arsenal 1/4
Draw 7/2
Blackburn 10/1
Get on: Arsenal
Arsenal have won every match they’ve played at Highbury this season and they’ve won their last five matches against Blackburn without conceding a goal. ‘Nailed on’ springs to mind.
Match Special:
Blackburn to have a player sent off 6/1
Aston Villa v Charlton Saturday 26th November 15.00
Aston Villa 11/8
Draw 11/5
Charlton 13/8
Get on: Aston Villa
Villa’s win at the Stadium of Light could well kick-start their season, Phillips and Baros are warm; home win.
Match Special:
Phillips and Baros both to score 7/1
Man City v Liverpool Saturday 26th November 15.00
Man City 6/4
Draw 11/5
Liverpool 6/4
Get on: Liverpool
Liverpool head to Manchester full of confidence, they’ve finally found their scoring touch and they’re incredibly tight at the back. 6/4? Yes please.
Match Special:
Cisse to score the only goal of the game 33/1
Sunderland v Birmingham Saturday 26th November 15.00
Sunderland 6/4
Draw 11/5
Birmingham 6/4
Get on: Birmingham
The Mackems have conceded three or more goals in their last six matches; with a defence that leaky, even the goal-shy Blues should take advantage. Sunderland have never scored against Birmingham in the Premiership; away win.
Match Special:
Emile Heskey to score at any time 11/8
Wigan v Tottenham Saturday 26th November 15.00
Wigan 7/4
Draw 9/4
Tottenham 5/4
Get on: Wigan
Wigan should score, only Chelsea have kept a clean sheet against the Latics this season. Defoe was dropped like a hot potato last week, Spurs may draw a blank.
Match Special:
Wigan to win 1-0 7/1
Portsmouth v Chelsea Saturday 26th November 17.15 Live on Premiership Plus
Portsmouth 13/2
Draw 10/3
Chelsea 1/3
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea have thrashed Pompey recently, winning by two or more goals in their last four meetings. Portsmouth need a miracle.
Match Special:
Chelsea to win 2-0 11/2
Everton v Newcastle Sunday 27th November 13.30 Live on Sky
Everton 6/4
Draw 11/5
Newcastle 6/4
Get on: Draw
This one should be tight. Everton have scored against Newcastle in their last 11 meetings; with Owen and Shearer back, the Geordies should also find the back of the net. 11 of Everton’s last 12 league matches have produced 2 goals or less. 1-1 it is then.
Match Special:
Match to finish 1-1 11/2
Fulham v Bolton Sunday 27th November 14.00
Fulham 6/4
Draw 11/5
Bolton 6/4
Get on: Fulham
Every tine Bolton have travelled to the Cottage in the Premiership, they’ve took a beating. Malbranque and Diop are looking sharp; home win.
Match Special:
Malbranque to score at any time 11/4
Middlesbrough v West Brom Sunday 27th November 15.00
Middlesbrough 8/11
Draw 9/4
West Brom 10/3
Get on: Middlesbrough
West Brom have only scored one league goal away from home this season. Historically, they’ve not won in Middlesbrough since 1952 and they’ve conceded 16 goals on their last six trips. A shoeing awaits.
Match Special:
Middlesbrough to win by two or more goals 7/4
West Ham v Man Utd Sunday 27th November 16.00 Live on Sky
West Ham 4/1
Draw 12/5
Man Utd 8/13
Get on: Man Utd
Man U have scored goals for fun against West Ham in recent seasons, 35 goals in 11 games. United are the top goal scorers away from home in the Premiership; away win.
Match Special:
Rooney to score two or more goals 9/2
Wednesday, November 9, 2005
Becks, Rugs and Rock and Roll
We’ve all heard the expression, ‘It could be a war out there’, when Argentina play England at football; it’s not a cliché, it’s a valid prediction.
Tension between the two countries began to surface in 1982, when an argument broke out over the Wolves and Ipswich defender, Mel Venus.
The hostility increased at the World Cup of 1998, where in a moment of madness, David Beckham made a decision that upset the whole of England; he agreed to marry Victoria Adams.
Also in ’98, Beckham was sent off for kicking Diego Simeone, but fate allowed Beckham to partially redeem himself four years later, as his penalty effectively sent the Argies home from the 2002 World Cup.
David Beckham and his wife normally shy away from the spotlight, but he’s always at the centre of attention when England face Argentina; you can back Beckham to score the only goal of the game at 55/1.
In a somewhat surprising move, Sven has recalled David ‘Calamity’ James and Peter Crouch to the squad for the Argentina match; hopefully he’ll play James up front and Crouch in goal.
Admittedly, I’m not a football manager, I’m a gambling guru; but if I had to pick an England team, I wouldn’t touch Crouch with a barge-pole, in fact, I’d rather play the barge-pole. For all you believers, Crouch is a 9/1 shot to score the last goal.
One of my South American contacts has advised me to back Placente to score the first goal for the Argies at 50/1, but I’ve found that somewhat hard to swallow. I’ll be on the draw at 15/8.
The Americans are marching towards Scotland, and somewhat surprisingly, it’s not related to North Sea oil. According to FIFA, the Yanks are the 7th strongest team in the World, which is absolutely ridiculous; it’s the biggest joke in International football since Robbie Savage. Don’t fall for FIFA’s rug-pulling, Scotland are terrific value at 7/5.
France v Germany is an interesting match. Both countries dislike America; I wish they could both win. With Thierry Henry firing on all cylinders, France are the call at 5/6.
The following specials are all available at Super Soccer.
“Oil be back” – The USA to win from behind 11/1
“Argy bargy” – Argentina to have a player sent off 8/1
“Turk up like a kipper” – Hakan Sukur to score with a header 8/1
“The Italian Job” – Italy to score three or more goals 7/1
“Rocking Robin” – Van Persie to score two or more goals 9/1
“A Swiss Roll” – Switzerland to score three or more goals 11/2
“Lord of the Fries” – Thierry Henry to score a hat-trick 16/1
“Throw the towel in” – Germany to have a player sent off 11/1
Quote of the week:
“He is very special, and I would like to have him in the World Cup squad.”
Sven Goran Eriksson should have spent more money on English lessons, Peter Crouch is the subject.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Wayne ‘Rucker’ Rooney may be considered the best thing since canned lager, but his contribution to World Cup qualification was minimal. Rooney hasn’t scored a competitive goal for England since Euro 2004.
Acc of the week:
Scotland
Holland
France
Spain
Uruguay
The five-fold pays a juicy 18/1.
Weekend Betting:
Scotland v USA International Friendly Saturday 12th November 16.00 Live on Sky
Scotland 7/5
Draw 11/5
USA 6/4
Get on: Scotland
Here’s a sentence you rarely see, Scotland are value to win a football match.
Match Special:
Scotland to keep a clean sheet 6/4
Argentina v England International Friendly Saturday 12th November 16.45 Live on BBC
Argentina 7/5
Draw 15/8
England 7/4
Get on: Draw
This is why bookmakers all drive Ferraris. Any result is possible, except the one that I back. I’m losing my money on the draw.
Match Special:
Lampard to score a penalty 7/1
Holland v Italy International Friendly Saturday 12th November 19.45 Live on Bravo
Holland 6/5
Draw 2/1
Italy 2/1
Get on: Holland
The future’s bright, the future’s orange. 6/5 for the Dutch is a corking investment.
Match Special:
Van Nistelrooy and Van Persie both to score 8/1
France v Germany International Friendly Saturday 12th November 20.00 Live on Eurosport
France 5/6
Draw 9/4
Germany 13/5
Get on: France
The French have quality throughout their team. The Germans have Michael Ballack.
Match Special:
Henry and Trezeguet both to score 5/1
Norway v Czech Rep World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 18.30
Norway 2/1
Draw 2/1
Czech Rep 5/4
Get on: Czech Rep
The Czech’s were unlucky to draw Holland in their qualifying group. Will the Czech Republic lose? Nor way.
Match Special:
Milan Baros to score at any time 6/4
Switzerland v Turkey World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 19.45 Live on Setanta
Switzerland 6/4
Draw 15/8
Turkey 7/4
Get on: Switzerland
The Swiss will get the result they need at home, but the 2nd leg in Turkey will be no picnic.
Match Special:
Frei to score with a header 7/1
Spain v Slovakia World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 21.00
Spain 1/4
Draw 7/2
Slovakia 10/1
Get on: Spain
The Spanish were rubbing their hands after the draw, they can afford to take a little siesta and still win the match.
Match Special:
Raul to score two or more goals 7/2
Uruguay v Australia World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 23.00
Uruguay 4/7
Draw 9/4
Australia 5/1
Get on: Uruguay
The Uruguayan coach will play videos of neighbours in the dressing room pre-match to get the players nicely wound up. Uruguay beat Argentina at home, and drew with Brazil home and away; the Aussies are if for a mullering.
Match Special:
Uruguay to score in both halves 6/4
Betting at Soccerphile
Tension between the two countries began to surface in 1982, when an argument broke out over the Wolves and Ipswich defender, Mel Venus.
The hostility increased at the World Cup of 1998, where in a moment of madness, David Beckham made a decision that upset the whole of England; he agreed to marry Victoria Adams.
Also in ’98, Beckham was sent off for kicking Diego Simeone, but fate allowed Beckham to partially redeem himself four years later, as his penalty effectively sent the Argies home from the 2002 World Cup.
David Beckham and his wife normally shy away from the spotlight, but he’s always at the centre of attention when England face Argentina; you can back Beckham to score the only goal of the game at 55/1.
In a somewhat surprising move, Sven has recalled David ‘Calamity’ James and Peter Crouch to the squad for the Argentina match; hopefully he’ll play James up front and Crouch in goal.
Admittedly, I’m not a football manager, I’m a gambling guru; but if I had to pick an England team, I wouldn’t touch Crouch with a barge-pole, in fact, I’d rather play the barge-pole. For all you believers, Crouch is a 9/1 shot to score the last goal.
One of my South American contacts has advised me to back Placente to score the first goal for the Argies at 50/1, but I’ve found that somewhat hard to swallow. I’ll be on the draw at 15/8.
The Americans are marching towards Scotland, and somewhat surprisingly, it’s not related to North Sea oil. According to FIFA, the Yanks are the 7th strongest team in the World, which is absolutely ridiculous; it’s the biggest joke in International football since Robbie Savage. Don’t fall for FIFA’s rug-pulling, Scotland are terrific value at 7/5.
France v Germany is an interesting match. Both countries dislike America; I wish they could both win. With Thierry Henry firing on all cylinders, France are the call at 5/6.
The following specials are all available at Super Soccer.
“Oil be back” – The USA to win from behind 11/1
“Argy bargy” – Argentina to have a player sent off 8/1
“Turk up like a kipper” – Hakan Sukur to score with a header 8/1
“The Italian Job” – Italy to score three or more goals 7/1
“Rocking Robin” – Van Persie to score two or more goals 9/1
“A Swiss Roll” – Switzerland to score three or more goals 11/2
“Lord of the Fries” – Thierry Henry to score a hat-trick 16/1
“Throw the towel in” – Germany to have a player sent off 11/1
Quote of the week:
“He is very special, and I would like to have him in the World Cup squad.”
Sven Goran Eriksson should have spent more money on English lessons, Peter Crouch is the subject.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Wayne ‘Rucker’ Rooney may be considered the best thing since canned lager, but his contribution to World Cup qualification was minimal. Rooney hasn’t scored a competitive goal for England since Euro 2004.
Acc of the week:
Scotland
Holland
France
Spain
Uruguay
The five-fold pays a juicy 18/1.
Weekend Betting:
Scotland v USA International Friendly Saturday 12th November 16.00 Live on Sky
Scotland 7/5
Draw 11/5
USA 6/4
Get on: Scotland
Here’s a sentence you rarely see, Scotland are value to win a football match.
Match Special:
Scotland to keep a clean sheet 6/4
Argentina v England International Friendly Saturday 12th November 16.45 Live on BBC
Argentina 7/5
Draw 15/8
England 7/4
Get on: Draw
This is why bookmakers all drive Ferraris. Any result is possible, except the one that I back. I’m losing my money on the draw.
Match Special:
Lampard to score a penalty 7/1
Holland v Italy International Friendly Saturday 12th November 19.45 Live on Bravo
Holland 6/5
Draw 2/1
Italy 2/1
Get on: Holland
The future’s bright, the future’s orange. 6/5 for the Dutch is a corking investment.
Match Special:
Van Nistelrooy and Van Persie both to score 8/1
France v Germany International Friendly Saturday 12th November 20.00 Live on Eurosport
France 5/6
Draw 9/4
Germany 13/5
Get on: France
The French have quality throughout their team. The Germans have Michael Ballack.
Match Special:
Henry and Trezeguet both to score 5/1
Norway v Czech Rep World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 18.30
Norway 2/1
Draw 2/1
Czech Rep 5/4
Get on: Czech Rep
The Czech’s were unlucky to draw Holland in their qualifying group. Will the Czech Republic lose? Nor way.
Match Special:
Milan Baros to score at any time 6/4
Switzerland v Turkey World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 19.45 Live on Setanta
Switzerland 6/4
Draw 15/8
Turkey 7/4
Get on: Switzerland
The Swiss will get the result they need at home, but the 2nd leg in Turkey will be no picnic.
Match Special:
Frei to score with a header 7/1
Spain v Slovakia World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 21.00
Spain 1/4
Draw 7/2
Slovakia 10/1
Get on: Spain
The Spanish were rubbing their hands after the draw, they can afford to take a little siesta and still win the match.
Match Special:
Raul to score two or more goals 7/2
Uruguay v Australia World Cup Qualifying play-off 1st Leg Saturday 12th November 23.00
Uruguay 4/7
Draw 9/4
Australia 5/1
Get on: Uruguay
The Uruguayan coach will play videos of neighbours in the dressing room pre-match to get the players nicely wound up. Uruguay beat Argentina at home, and drew with Brazil home and away; the Aussies are if for a mullering.
Match Special:
Uruguay to score in both halves 6/4
Betting at Soccerphile
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